10/28/2008

How to love

How to Love

Love is a strange thing. It can be the most amazing feeling in the world, or it can really hurt, but in the end love is something most, if not all of us, will face. While there are many different ways to define love and there are many different ways to love someone (even yourself), here is a general guide to loving.

1. Say it. When you say the words "I Love You," do they carry it with them the desire to show someone you love them or do they carry it with them is it what you want to feel? And when you say it make sure you really mean it and are willing to do anything for that special person.

2. Empathize. Put yourself in someone else's shoes. Rather than impose your own expectations or attempt to control them, try to understand how they feel, where they come from, and who they are; and realize how they could also love you back just as well.

3. Love unconditionally.
If you cannot love another person without attaching stipulations, then it is not love at all, but deep-seated opportunism (one who makes the most of an advantage, often unmindful of others). If your interest is not in the other person as such, but rather in how that person can enhance your experience of life, then it is not unconditional. If you have no intention of improving that person’s life, or allowing that person to be themselves and accepting them as they are, and not who you want them to be, then you are not striving to love them unconditionally.

4. Expect nothing in return.
That doesn't mean you should allow someone to mistreat or undervalue you. It means that giving love does not guarantee receiving love. Try loving just for loving's sake. Realize that someone may have a different way of showing his or her love for you; do not expect to be loved back in exactly the same way.

5. Realize it can be lost.
If you realize that you can lose the one you love, then you have a greater appreciation of what you have. Think how lucky you are to have someone to love.



* It does not make you a bad person to desire someone else's love, even if they do not love you. However, to truly love someone, you must let them be free. It is selfish to blame them for your feelings.
* There are many types of love, for example: a mother-son love is different from a best friend's love, which is different from a romantic love. Don't be ashamed to tell anyone that you love your friends as much as you love anyone else in your life.
* You have to find someone that will suit you, someone you feel comfortable with - not just someone to make love to.
* As a word, love can be found worldwide and is often used to describe compassion and/or emotional attachment. Accepting those you love for who they are is part of love. You also need to learn to accept yourself before you can accept another. If you cannot love your self, how are you to love another?
* Love genuinely. Do not compare your feelings now to what your feelings were when you were with another mate. At times, we can experience rejection.
* Realize that love is a feeling and attempt to assist, but ultimately, you are the one who must take action in order to discover love.
* Do things that make the other person feel good, but do not smoother them with gifts and attention.
* Consider some tips about what people in love do.
o People in love are sensitive to each other's needs, and endeavor to meet them even when they do not feel like doing it.
o Men and women may be equal in value but different by nature.
People who truly are in love give their mates "space" to develop their potential and find their fulfillment in life.

Sometimes love is all we need
o Love does not brag. People who are truly in love refrain from rehearsing their good traits just to show off. Bragging in a relationship often is really defensiveness.
o People who are truly in love do not insist that their way is best and demand that their mates give in to them.
o People who are truly in love are considerate of each others feelings and courteous in their actions toward one another. Sadly sarcasm is a way of life for some couples. They ridicule each other, belittle each other and trade jibes with a fury. They may say it is all in fun, but it leaves wounds that will someday become festering sores.
o People who are truly in love look out for their mates' best interests as much as their own. Those in love should be concerned not only about their own individual interests, but about the interests of the other as well.
o People who truly love control their anger when the other displeases them. We are all human, and all humans feel anger periodically, but we only express our anger in destructive ways when we counting on someone else to meet our needs.
o People who truly love each other do not take pleasure in their mates' disappointments or failures.
o People who truly love each other treat their mates with absolute trust. Some husbands and wives torment themselves with groundless suspicions. If you look for trouble you will find it every time.
o People who truly love look forward to their relationship growing more meaningful and precious. They have hope. Which is an attitude that happily anticipates the good. It isn't being blind and denies there are problems, but it does look beyond the problems. People who truly love each other do not allow their problems to rob them of their happiness.
* Remember there is no failure in love, because once you tell somebody who you love, that you love him/her, then you have already succeeded in love.

* You must love yourself before you can love another.
* There is always the risk of getting hurt, but that's part of letting yourself fully love and trust some one. Being hurt could be long-lasting and could hurt more than anything in the world.
* Realize what you have while you have it, and care for the person you trust.
* If something comes to an end, try to let go rather than holding on; it's for the best.
* The idea of love is fueled by childhood fantasies. The love shown in movies, as obtainable as it may be, is rare to say the least.
* You just may find your soul-mate sooner than you want to.
* If you feel any doubt of love your partner has for you, it is probably true. when you give and receive love 100%, you will have no doubt in your heart.
* Don't ask for love - you should receive love because your partner wants to give you love - not because you want it from your partner.
* Do not force love - it will come in good time, it will come.

Believe. God will give you in best time. Learn to love your self and learn to love other in right way. Soon, you'll find your soulmate.

10/25/2008

Date on a budget


How to Date on a Budget

Once upon a time a cheap date used to be a movie and a bite afterwards. Not so anymore! That might sound like a fairy tale, but it is the truth.
A movie and popcorn is one of the most expensive dates there is today, unless you figure a burger and coke! Sure, thats cheap, but what do you do before or after?
A little thought on your part, and the right partner, can make a great date, and still leave some change in your pocket.


1. The first date should be a meeting to see if you both enjoy the same things and how well you relate to each other.
Ask them out for a cup of coffee or ice cream. Take a walk. Talk on the telephone, or email. Learn what means a lot to them, and the things that they enjoy doing. This information will enable you to prepare for the first actual date. You cannot plan, for instance, a picnic in the park, if the date is used to eating at the Ritz.


2. Have coffee in a large bookstore cafe, and look through the books, or music to get an idea of what your partner enjoys. If your partner looks interested in any particular items that they sell, or the candy on display, mark it down to memory. These things are useful when holidays or special moments come around, or when you want to just give them a gift to please them.

3.
Scan the newspapers for interesting places to visit. There usually is a concert in the park, or perhaps in the Mall. This can be great fun and is an inexpensive 'date'. This also could be quite romantic, if you hold hands while walking to find a seat, or just walking the Mall. Just remember to bring her a small gift when you picked them up.
Did you remember what they were looking at when you met at the bookstore? Your date will be surprised and pleased that you noticed and remembered!


4. For women or guys who like the outdoors, spend the day on a nature trail, in the park, or on the beach and pack a picnic lunch with their favorite foods to make it extra special. End the day, by having a movie night for two, with candy and home-popped popcorn. Go together, and pick out a movie that you both would enjoy.

5. Show your partner affection and let them know you love having them close. Lunch at a fast food place will seem like a great place to eat, because you are enjoying just being together. Meet with friends later, for coffee and dessert.
When the relationship is a good one, you do not have to spend a lot of money because your date will be happy just to be with you, even if you only spend the day walking in the park. While walking you get to know each other better, and will have things to talk about when you date again.


* Hunt for gift items, at discount stores. Buy greeting cards, for all occasions, and the Dollar Card Stores. It is not the price that counts, it is the thought. Make a card yourself, and add your own words and thoughts.
* If you like to cook, pasta dinner, with salad and inexpensive wine, makes for a great budget dinner. Do not forget to have candles on the table, for that romantic touch.
* If you are really on a budget, you can borrow movies from the library (some libraries might charge you, others might not, so check first).
*
Check out your local zoo or museum, usually these are inexpensive places to go on a date and explore a little. Occasionally, these places will also have Free days. Also look to see if a carnival is in town too.

* Plan a road trip to a fun place or accompany her on an errand such as grocery shopping. (This works well if you've been friends for awhile)
* Go Dutch (Sometimes women do not like having the guy pay for everything. Paying separately or have alternate between who pays can add variety)

* Remember that if you are planning on a long term relation, each partner should enjoy the other's company, not the lifestyle this person can provide. If you are supposed to pay all the time, just for the honor of having the other persons company, that relation is worthless and dangerous.

* Because of rising gas prices, a walk in town or a walk through a mall could be better ideas for those on strict budgets, this also allows you to get to know them better by seeing which stores they are attracted to.
* If there is a minor league sports team nearby, consider going to a game. Tickets to these events are often only a couple of dollars, and are a great way to spend the afternoon or evening.

* Check around your community for independently-owned or discount movie theatres. Tickets will cost less (often only two or three dollars), as will concessions. In addition, these theatres will be less crowded, so you're less likely to get stuck behind someone tall or in front of someone loud.
* Be wary of partners who window shop with you, and only show you the most expensive items. Watch to see if your "partner" orders the most expensive meal on the menu, or discusses expensive ways to spend the day. All they want is someone to pay their way, and are probably not there for a long term relationship. Make sure that when you first meet, they do not know you have a lot of money so that their choice on whether to date you or not is not based on money at all. When the money goes, so will they!

10/17/2008

When Asked on a Date


How to Respond When Asked on a Date

Not sure how to answer a guy who has asked you out?

1. If you want to go out with him, then just say yes. If you really like him, then go for it. Even if you get embarrassed easily, it's just one word.

2. If you don't want to go out with him, don't say yes! This could just end up hurting him more - no one wants to go out with someone who doesn't like them.

3. Try to say either yes or no. Even if you're shocked, do not say maybe.

4. If you don't like the guy that way, then say no in a nice way. Don't be harsh in your letdown; it probably took him weeks to get the courage to confront you.


5. Never say yes if you don't want to be his girlfriend. It's better to get rejected than to think you have a chance with someone when you don't.


6. If you do say no try to put him down gently, but don't go on and on. It will just get boring and uncomfortable, and you giving him all the reasons why you don't want to go out with him wont help him.


7. If you want a date with him but you think the time is not suitable, just propose another time so that he doesn't take it as a rejection.



* Don't act desperate when you say yes, you'll only embarrass yourself.
* Say, "Yeah, sounds like fun!" or, "Yes, I'd love to."
* A cute, flirtatious, 'sure!' would also win the day.

* If you say no, don't carry on having stabs at him and his confidence.
* How do you know that you won't like this guy? I've had experiences where I will say, "Yes," anyways and end up having a great time! Give the guy a chance! After all, he was brave enough to ask.

* NEVER spread gossips on someone to whom you've said no. Once you've done so your point is made and there's little point giving him a hard time.

How to Reject Someone Without Breaking Their Heart


How to Reject Someone Without Breaking Their Heart

Ever wanted to reject someone without the heartbreak and tears? It's not that hard, really. Just be sure to follow a few of these ideas and you will be able to step away from the encounter unscathed.

1. Look around to make sure no one's watching. The worst that can happen is being rejected in front of other people! If there are people present, take their arm and try to slide away from the others. Perhaps if you can slip into a semi-private corner or at least to where the others are not within hearing distance.

2. Act like you feel sorry, and smile at the right times.
Make sure you smile regretfully, like you really just wish you could give them a chance but it's not going to happen. This will soften the actual blow from the words.


3. Cheer them up a little. Be very kind to the person; being kind makes it easier on them.
Be sure that your kindness does not stray into pity. The worst thing in a rejection is pity. They have put all their dignity and pride on the line, and pitying them will only make it harder on both of you to stay calm. If you act like you really don't want this person, be prepared for their reactions, mostly dejection, awkwardness and pain.


4. Use a calm, collected voice when speaking to them. Don't blurt out the first thing that comes into your head. Take a pause before you say anything and think of the best thing to say to either end all of the attraction instantly or keep them as a friend. Act like you care when you say "No", or you may start waterworks.

------------------

* You have to understand how degrading it is for boys to be rejected.
* Don't be so rude to them! What point would there be in trying not to break their heart if you're rude!?
* If the person gets mad, stay calm and keep acting a little sorry, but happy as well to try to calm them down.
* The best thing to say when turning down someone that you do know or will have to see on a regular basis is that you have stronger feelings as friends. This gives them their answer, without giving them any hope for the future.
* If this is a person that you don't like at all, or will not have to ever see again, then keep the rejection as blunt as possible without being unnecessarily mean. This guarantees that they will not try again and will also not say bad things about you when you're not around.
* It is also possible to say that you are honoured that they have feelings for you but it is not possible at this time for you to return them, but you hope that you can remain friends.

* Do not flirt with them during or anytime soon after the rejection. It is very easy to just charm them with a compliment as you let them down, but be sure not to lay it on too thick or the "No" you are issuing will not be heard.

* If you feel,however, that although now is not the right time, but maybe someday, give them hope with clear outlines. Let them know where they stand and perhaps what is holding you back from saying yes now.

10/14/2008

Love Hurts


How love hurts and several quotes from well known authors regarding how much pain a feeling of love can cause.


Love is great when it is fresh and happening and when you feel it slipping away, both the times love makes us feel there is nothing like love in our life. Though love gives a certain high at the time when both of you are feeling the same things, there is nothing more painful that your love going away.love hurts

Love hurts so much that at times it leaves you in depth of sadness which is certainly larger than the high of happiness it gave you. A breakup is the thing about love, a reason that prompts many to avoid being in love. Many simply ignore the realization that they are in love because they dread the time when this feeling will wear itself off and the remains of love will be torn to shred by arguments and fights and usual drifting away.

Many famous people have fallen in love again and again only to grow apart and feel the sadness that love tends to give after it goes away. There are very less numbers of people who have not experienced love and almost all who have experienced love have experienced the heartbreak that follows love, bar a few lucky ones. Many writers have expressed their feelings about how love hurts in most apt way and that is through quotes.


As famous poet and writer Oscar Wilde puts it, “when one is in love, one always begins by deceiving oneself, and one always ends by deceiving others, that is what the world calls romance.”

Love is blind and has been proven more than one time, often couples in love do not see stark differences that are obvious to others in their personality. Love often makes people do things and act in certain ways, that are surprising to others as well as themselves, heart wants to love whether or not brains allows it, therefore, rational decision making rarely takes place when people are in love.

There are quotes made by other famous literary giants like William Shakespeare who wrote “The courses of true love never did run smooth!” this happens to be true too, most passionate love affairs have ended up rather tragically, with either the couple breaking up with some one causing the breakup or one among the couple passing away. Whenever there is true love there is no dearth of troubles coming its way.

There is another quote from an anonymous author who quotes, “Why is it always that we don’t know when love happens, and we always know the moment it ends?” True some people though they do recognize the feeling of love, and they know that they are in love tend to ignore it to the extent they can. It is mere fear of the break up and the denial that love cannot happen to them makes them react in such a way to love, however whenever love has ended we accept it and face it faster than we recognized it.

End of love means end of the world for some, where people are unable to comes to terms with the end in relationship often get depressed and are more likely to try drastic methods since they cannot stand the pain end of relationship brings together. There is a proverb that proves love to be a truthful thing it is “where there is love there is pain”. Love can bring up pain in different forms not just through break up.

Love gives pain whenever your beloved is in pain or suffering. Love ensures that you will suffer as much or maybe more when your beloved is suffering just because you cannot do anything to ease out the pain and the emotional turbulence your beloved is going through.

Another quote by William Shakespeare proves how difficult it can be to comes to terms with a breakup, he quotes “Love is a smoke made with the fumes of sighs.” This quote speaks so much about feeling of losing out on something precious that a breakup tends to bring. No wonder people who have been through this feeling sigh away their sadness.

All pain that there is in love is given all the more aptly by George Granville, who writes “Of all pains, the greatest pain, is to love, and to love in vain.” Whenever feelings of love are not reciprocated or the relationship that one values so much is not valued equally by the partner, definitely the feeling of loving in vain would come. The feeling of not being esteemed as much as you esteemed another person will surely cause pain.

Love hurts through different ways, you can be in love and with the one you love and still be hurt, or a breakup in a relationship can hurt. It does not take a long time to end a relationship, but it surely takes a lifetime to forget someone you once loved so dearly.

10/11/2008

Into you or not?


It is said that the love of a man for woman could be recognized very easily but it is very difficult to define it.

There are no clear-cut formulae to explain love. However, here are a few tips that had been provided by people who are supposed to be knowledgeable in matters of love.


* The man can't seem to stop talking to you everyday.

* He is not dating anybody else except you.

* He starts treating your mother the way he treats his own mother.

* He starts using possessive words like "we", "our", and "us" more during conversations with you, particularly when he is talking about the future.

* He is keeping a photo of yours on his desk.
* He starts keeping your favorite food items in his refrigerator.
* He bestows top priority to you over his work and other relationships.
* He keeps saying nice things about you when he talks to his friends.
* He does all your errands without the least hesitation.
* He keeps looking at you in the most admiring way even when prettier women are around.

Remember that love in real life is not as easy as it is shown in movies.

When a man is in love with you, the chances of breaking up are much higher. Even ordinary actions assume enormous importance in love, whether they are positive or negative. Hence, when you think that a man is in love with you, you should handle the entire matter with kid gloves.

Start taking a genuine interest in what he likes and dislikes, his tastes, habits, etc. It helps you in understanding him better. Further, with such knowledge, you would be able to avoid rubbing him the wrong way, which is as important as pleasing him.
When a man loves you, he starts giving lot of importance to you. Open flirting might not always mean that the man loves you but the bestowal of more attention to what you say and what you like is a definite sign of love. He would hasten to act all your requests, irrespective of the time of the day. Even if you call him at 2-00 a.m. in the morning and tell him that you have headache but out of stock of the medication, he would rush to a 24-hour drugstore, get the medicine and come to your place with that.

It is very difficult for men to show their love in an open manner. Even the most courageous man would become a coward when it comes to the woman he loves. His speech would be halting and hesitant. He would start to say something, stop, think it over again and then utter what is in his mind.

It is because he is just getting to know you better and still not sure whether you would like what he says. Even though women are usually more guarded in the initial stages, men are equally nervous around the women they love. However, the man who is in love with you would take extra steps in pleasing you. He would groom his hair and straighten his dress more often, when he is with you. Such acts reveal that he wants to look good for you.

Take a mental note of them. He would talk to you in a low voice so that others would not be able to hear what he says. This would mean that he wants the conversation to be exclusively between him and you.
He would compliment you not only in person but also to his friends. He would speak highly of you to others. He would go the extra mile in showing respect to your mother, if you happen to introduce her to him. He would call you several times a day without any special reason.

Whenever he is talking about the future, he would tend to use words like "we", "us", and "our" than "I", "me", and "mine". Use of such words is a sure sign of his planning a future long-term relationship with you. He would be keeping your photo on his work desk as well as in his room. He would be stocking all the food and beverage items that you like, so that you are not disappointed at any time, if you are hungry when you are at his place.
He would tend to look at you in an admiring way whenever he is with you.

While you are leaving, he would keep looking at your back till you disappear from his view. He would arrive early for a meeting and would leave after you, if he is not accompanying you to your place. Even when he drops you at your home, he would wait till you have entered the house and closed the door before leaving. All these telltale signs would definitely show that the man is in love with you and desires a long-term relationship with you. Act positively and let not this chance pass you by.

10/07/2008

Love Stories

A girl and a boy were on a motorcycle, speeding through the night. They loved each other a lot.....
Girl:"slow down a little.. I'm scared.."
Boy: "No, it's so fun.."
Girl: "please..it's so scary.."
Boy: "Then say that you love me.."
Girl: "Fine..I love you..can you slow down now?"
Boy: "Give me a big hug.."

The girl gave him a big hug.

Girl: "Now can you slow down?"
Boy: "Can you take off my helmet and put it on? It's uncomfortable and it's bothering me while i ride."

The next day, there was a story in the newspaper. A motorcycle had crashed into a building because its brakes were broken.
There were two people on the motorcycle, of which one died, and the other had survived...The guy knew that the brakes were broken. He didn't want to let the girl know, because he knew that the girl would have gotten scared.
Instead, he was told the last time that she loved him,got a hug from her,put his helmet on her so that she can live, and die himself...

Once in a while, Right in the middle of an ordinary life, Love gives us a fairy tale...

"Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you hold well"


*************************** Story 2 ***************************

Nurse: "It was a busy morning, approximately 8:30 am, when an elderly gentleman, in his 80's, presented to have sutures (stitches) removed from his thumb.

He stated that he was in a hurry as he had an appointment at 9:00 am. I (nurse) took his vital signs and had him take a seat, knowing it would be over an hour befor e someone would to able to see him.

I saw him looking at his watch and decided, since I was not busy with another patient, I would evaluate his wound. On exam it was well healed,so I talked to one of the doctors, got the needed supplies to remove his sutures and redress his wound.

While taking care of his wound, we began to engage in conversation. Asked him if he had a doctor's appointment this morning somewhere else,as he was in such a hurry. The gentleman told me no, that he needed to go to the nursing home to eat breakfast with his wife.

I then inquired as to her health. He told me that she had been there for a while and that she was a victim of Alzheimer Disease.

As we talked, and I finished dressing his wound, I asked if she would be worried if he was a bit late. He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that she had not recognized him in five years now.

I was surprised, and asked him. "And you are still going every morning,even though she doesn't know who you are?" He smiled as he patted my hand and said. "She doesn't know me, but I still know who she is."

I had to hold back tears as he left, I had goose bumps on my arm, and thought, "That is the kind of love I want in my life."

True love is neither physical, nor romantic. True love is an acceptance of all that is, has been, will be, and will not be.

Good friends are like stars...You don't always see them, but you always know they're there


*************************** STORY 3 ***************************

The passengers on the bus watched sympathetically as the attractive young woman with the white cane made her way carefully up the steps. She paid the driver and, using her hands to feel the location of the seats, walked down the aisle and found the seat he'd told her was empty. Then she's settled in, placed her briefcase on her lap and rested her cane against her leg.

It had been a year since Susan became blind. Due to a medical misdiagnosis she had been rendered sightless, and she was suddenly thrown into a world of darkness, anger, frustration and self-pity. 'How could this have happened to me?' she would plead, her heart knotted with anger.
But no matter how much she cried or ranted or prayed, she knew the painful truth, her sight was never going to return.
A cloud of depression hung over Susan's once optimistic spirit. All she had to cling to was her husband Mark.

Mark was an Air Force officer and he loved Susan with all his heart. When she first lost her sight, he watched her sink into despair and was determined to help his wife gain the strength she needed to become independent again.

Finally, Susan felt ready to return to her job, but how would she get there? She used to take the bus, but was now too frightened to get around the city by herself. Mark volunteered to drive her to work each day, even though they worked at opposite ends of the city. At first, this comforted Susan and fulfilled Mark's need to protect his sightless wife who was so insecure about performing the slightest task. Soon, however Mark realized that this arrangement wasn't working - it was hectic, and costly.

Susan is going to have to start taking the bus again, he admitted to himself. But just the thought of mentioning it to her made him cringe.
She was still so fragile, so angry. How would she react?

Just as Mark predicted, Susan was horrified at the idea of taking the bus again. "I'm blind!" she responded bitterly. "How am I supposed to know where I'm going? I feel like you're abandoning me."

Mark's heart broke but he knew what had to be done. He promised Susan that each day he would ride the bus with her until she got the hang of it.

And that is exactly what happened. For two solid weeks, Mark, military uniform and all, accompanied Susan to and from work each day. He taught her how to rely on her other senses to determine where she was and how to adapt to her new environment. He helped her befriend the bus drivers who could watch out for her, and save her a seat. Each morning they made the journey together, and Mark would take a cab back to his office.

Although this routine was even more costly and exhausting than the previous one, Mark knew it was only a matter of time before Susan would be able to ride the bus on her own. Finally, Susan decided that she was ready to try the trip on her own. Monday morning arrived, and before she left, she threw her arms around Mark, her temporary bus riding companion, her
husband, and her best friend. Her eyes filled with tears of gratitude for his loyalty, his patience, his love.

She said good-bye, and for the first time, they went their separate ways.

Monday, Tuesday,

Wednesday, Thursday.... Each day on her own went perfectly, and Susan had never felt better.

On Friday mor ning, Susan took the bus to work as usual. As she was paying for her fare to exit the bus, the driver said, "Boy, I sure envy you."

Susan wasn't sure if the driver was speaking to her or not. After all, who on earth would ever envy a blind woman who had struggled just to find the courage to live for the past year? "Why do you envy me?"

The driver responded, "It must feel so good to be taken care of and protected like you are." Susan had no idea what the driver was talking about, "What do you mean?" The driver said, "You know, every morning for the past week, a fine looking gentleman in a military uniform has been standing across the corner watching you when you get off the bus. He makes sure you cross the street safely and he watches you until you enter your office building. Then he blows you a kiss, gives you a little salute and walks away. You are one lucky lady."

Tears of happiness poured down Susan's cheeks. For although she couldn't see him, she had always felt Mark's presence. She was blessed, so blessed, for he had given her a gift more powerful than sight, a gift she didn't need to see to believe - the gift of love that can bring light where there had been darkness.

"You don't love a woman because she is beautiful, but she is beautiful because you love her..."

So if you love someone be faithful to that person.


*************************** STORY 4 ***************************

From the very beginning, girl's family objected strongly on her dating this guy, saying that it has got to do with family background, & that the girl will have to suffer for the rest of her life if she were to be with him.

Due to family's pressure, the couple quarrelled very often. Though the girl loved the guy deeply, she always asked him: "How deep is your love for me?"

As the guy is not good with his words, this often caused the girl to be very upset. With that & the family's pressure, the girl often vents her anger on him. As for him, he only endured it in silence.

After a couple of years, the guy finally graduated & decided to further his studies overseas. Before leaving, he proposed to the girl:

"I'm not very good with words. But all I know is that I love you. If you allow me, I will take care of you for the rest of my life. As for your family, I'll try my best to talk them round. Will you marry me?" The girl agreed, & with the guy's determination, the family finally gave in &
agreed to let them get married. So before he left, they got engaged.

The girl went out to the working society, whereas the guy was overseas,continuing his studies. They sent their love through emails & phone calls.
Though it was hard, but both never thought of giving up.

One day, while the girl was on her way to work, she was knocked down by a car that lost control. when she woke up, she saw her parents beside her bed.. She realized that she was badly injured.

Seeing her mum crying, she wanted to comfort her. But she realized that all that could
come out of her mouth was just a sigh. she had lost her voice....

The doctor says that the impact on her brain has caused her to lose her voice. Listening to her parents' comfort, but with nothing coming out fromher, she broke down. During the stay in hospital, besides silence cry,..it's still just silence cry that accompanied her.

Upon reaching home, everything seems to be the same. Except for the ringing tone of the
phone. Which pierced into her heart everytime it rang. She does not wish to let the guy know & not wanting to be a burden to him, she wrote a letter to him saying that she does not wish to wait any longer.

With that, she sent the ring back to him. In return, the guy sent millions & millions of reply, countless of phonecalls,.. all the girl could do, besides crying, is still crying.... The parents decided to move away, hoping that she could eventually forget everything & be happy.

With a new environment, the girl learns sign language & started a new life. Te lling herself everyday that she must forget the guy.
One day, her friend came & told her that he's back. She asked her friend not to let
him know what happened to her. Since then, there wasn't anymore news of him.
A year has passed & her friend came with an envelope, containing ainvitation card for the guy's wedding. The girl was shattered. When she open the letter, she saw her name in it instead. When she was about to ask her friend what's going on, she saw the guy standing in front of her.

He used sign language to tell her "I've spent a year to learn sign language. Just to let you know that I've not forgotten our promise. Let me have the chance to be your voice. I Love You." With that, he slipped the ring back into her finger. The girl finally smiled.

Treat every relationship as if it's the last one, then you'll know how to Give. Treat every moment as is it's the last day, then you'll know how to treasure.

Treasure what you have right now, or else you will regret one day...
-----from : Ontanggabe Parulian --thanks buddy

10/04/2008

Signs of a lying partner


How to read the signs of a lying partner

Are you being lied to?

Knowing whether you are being lied to or not, does not require mind reading or psychic power.

Understanding the difference between the truth and a lie can all be determined by a person's behavior, and if you pay attention to these behaviors, you will be able to have a better idea of whether you are being lied to or not.

The most important thing you should always remember to do however is to trust your instincts. If you feel you are not getting the entire truth from your partner for some reason, then listen to your instincts.

Most people are in good touch with their instincts, but rather not listen to that inner voice because they refuse to believe that their partner would deceive them in any way. Staying in touch with your instincts will help guide you in the right direction.


Though instincts are a great help, they can be tricky. Majority of the times, your instincts will not lie to you, but there are times when your instincts can be influenced by your fears and insecurities. For example, you may already have fears of being cheated on, therefore you may feel that your partner is lying to you and cheating on you, when in fact he or she may be telling you the truth and completely faithful to you. This is why it is essential to understand the behavior of a liar, so that you define the difference between really catching on to a liar, or just being paranoid that your partner is lying to.

signs of lying


One important thing to remember is that the body never lies. If there are changes in the way your partner moves (or not moves) his/her arms, hands, head and the way his/her eyes shift, then you are most likely being lied to. The reason the body language changes when a person is lying is because the person now has to think of a way to seem convincing that he/she is telling the truth. Since he/she knows that whatever they are telling you is a lie, the behavior automatically changes, because they are now trying to act truthful, instead of actually being truthful. One big sign to look out for is in the eyes. If your partner avoids eye contact with you, then he/she is lying to you. There is a fear that you will see through him or her if there is eye contact, so eye contact will be avoided.

Whether you realize it or not, your body also communicates when you talk. When you are enthusiastic about telling your partner something and are telling the truth, you will move your hands around and will look into his/her eyes to make a connection. If your partner is lying however, he or she will tense up, will most likely tone down on the hand movement and eye connection and will seem different than other times. If your partner is the type to still move his/her hands around even when he/she is lying, then pay attention to the timing of the movements. Timing is everything and can define the difference between the truth and a lie. When a person is telling the truth for example, his/her hands (and whatever body movement he/she does) will move at the same time when telling you something. When he/she is lying however, the body language will be off and will usually come shortly after he/she has told you the lie. This is because they have to think about acting natural, and this thinking causes them to be off key, not to mention they are not really telling you the truth.

Another sign of a lying partner is if he/she touch his/her nose or face a lot while talking to you. They will feel nervous about telling you lies and will want to occupy their hands somehow as a way to cover up their lie, such as touching the nose, rubbing their eyes and so on. Your partner may even clear his or her throat more than usual than talking to you, look away a lot and/or say 'umm' when lying to you. They are using these as time killers so they can think of how to tell you the lie in the most convincing way possible. These are just some of the signs of a lying partner and are the most common signs.

Remember, it is always important to trust your instincts first. If you feel that your partner is lying to you, start paying closer attention to his/her behavior and if there are any changes, then you will be able to catch on to the lies better and can further investigate from that point.