How to Date on a Budget
Once upon a time a cheap date used to be a movie and a bite afterwards. Not so anymore! That might sound like a fairy tale, but it is the truth.
A movie and popcorn is one of the most expensive dates there is today, unless you figure a burger and coke! Sure, thats cheap, but what do you do before or after?
A little thought on your part, and the right partner, can make a great date, and still leave some change in your pocket.
1. The first date should be a meeting to see if you both enjoy the same things and how well you relate to each other.
Ask them out for a cup of coffee or ice cream. Take a walk. Talk on the telephone, or email. Learn what means a lot to them, and the things that they enjoy doing. This information will enable you to prepare for the first actual date. You cannot plan, for instance, a picnic in the park, if the date is used to eating at the Ritz.
2. Have coffee in a large bookstore cafe, and look through the books, or music to get an idea of what your partner enjoys. If your partner looks interested in any particular items that they sell, or the candy on display, mark it down to memory. These things are useful when holidays or special moments come around, or when you want to just give them a gift to please them.
3. Scan the newspapers for interesting places to visit. There usually is a concert in the park, or perhaps in the Mall. This can be great fun and is an inexpensive 'date'. This also could be quite romantic, if you hold hands while walking to find a seat, or just walking the Mall. Just remember to bring her a small gift when you picked them up.
Did you remember what they were looking at when you met at the bookstore? Your date will be surprised and pleased that you noticed and remembered!
4. For women or guys who like the outdoors, spend the day on a nature trail, in the park, or on the beach and pack a picnic lunch with their favorite foods to make it extra special. End the day, by having a movie night for two, with candy and home-popped popcorn. Go together, and pick out a movie that you both would enjoy.
5. Show your partner affection and let them know you love having them close. Lunch at a fast food place will seem like a great place to eat, because you are enjoying just being together. Meet with friends later, for coffee and dessert.
When the relationship is a good one, you do not have to spend a lot of money because your date will be happy just to be with you, even if you only spend the day walking in the park. While walking you get to know each other better, and will have things to talk about when you date again.
* Hunt for gift items, at discount stores. Buy greeting cards, for all occasions, and the Dollar Card Stores. It is not the price that counts, it is the thought. Make a card yourself, and add your own words and thoughts.
* If you like to cook, pasta dinner, with salad and inexpensive wine, makes for a great budget dinner. Do not forget to have candles on the table, for that romantic touch.
* If you are really on a budget, you can borrow movies from the library (some libraries might charge you, others might not, so check first). *
Check out your local zoo or museum, usually these are inexpensive places to go on a date and explore a little. Occasionally, these places will also have Free days. Also look to see if a carnival is in town too.
* Plan a road trip to a fun place or accompany her on an errand such as grocery shopping. (This works well if you've been friends for awhile)
* Go Dutch (Sometimes women do not like having the guy pay for everything. Paying separately or have alternate between who pays can add variety)
* Remember that if you are planning on a long term relation, each partner should enjoy the other's company, not the lifestyle this person can provide. If you are supposed to pay all the time, just for the honor of having the other persons company, that relation is worthless and dangerous.
* Because of rising gas prices, a walk in town or a walk through a mall could be better ideas for those on strict budgets, this also allows you to get to know them better by seeing which stores they are attracted to.
* If there is a minor league sports team nearby, consider going to a game. Tickets to these events are often only a couple of dollars, and are a great way to spend the afternoon or evening.
* Check around your community for independently-owned or discount movie theatres. Tickets will cost less (often only two or three dollars), as will concessions. In addition, these theatres will be less crowded, so you're less likely to get stuck behind someone tall or in front of someone loud.
* Be wary of partners who window shop with you, and only show you the most expensive items. Watch to see if your "partner" orders the most expensive meal on the menu, or discusses expensive ways to spend the day. All they want is someone to pay their way, and are probably not there for a long term relationship. Make sure that when you first meet, they do not know you have a lot of money so that their choice on whether to date you or not is not based on money at all. When the money goes, so will they!
How to Respond When Asked on a Date Not sure how to answer a guy who has asked you out?
1. If you want to go out with him, then just say yes. If you really like him, then go for it. Even if you get embarrassed easily, it's just one word.2. If you don't want to go out with him, don't say yes! This could just end up hurting him more - no one wants to go out with someone who doesn't like them.3. Try to say either yes or no. Even if you're shocked, do not say maybe.
4. If you don't like the guy that way, then say no in a nice way. Don't be harsh in your letdown; it probably took him weeks to get the courage to confront you.
5. Never say yes if you don't want to be his girlfriend. It's better to get rejected than to think you have a chance with someone when you don't.
6. If you do say no try to put him down gently, but don't go on and on. It will just get boring and uncomfortable, and you giving him all the reasons why you don't want to go out with him wont help him.
7. If you want a date with him but you think the time is not suitable, just propose another time so that he doesn't take it as a rejection. * Don't act desperate when you say yes, you'll only embarrass yourself. * Say, "Yeah, sounds like fun!" or, "Yes, I'd love to."
* A cute, flirtatious, 'sure!' would also win the day. * If you say no, don't carry on having stabs at him and his confidence.
* How do you know that you won't like this guy? I've had experiences where I will say, "Yes," anyways and end up having a great time! Give the guy a chance! After all, he was brave enough to ask. * NEVER spread gossips on someone to whom you've said no. Once you've done so your point is made and there's little point giving him a hard time.
This article will describe what a woman finds most annoying in her partner.
Though this is a much debated topic, we know for sure that a woman never likes a man who is weak or shows too much of interest in her initially. Similarly there are many points that psychologists have tried to analyze. It would be very easy to put it down in a few simple points, but perhaps it is best to debate this topic by asking questions.
How would you feel if you see your man with another woman what women hate about men enjoying a cup of coffee at the coffee shop around the street corner?
Chances are, you would feel a sense of jealousy, even if the woman is just an office colleague who just wanted to feel a little relaxed. This is just an example and hundreds more can be cited. Any relationship can survive just on one sentence
�Trust me and I will never let you down�.
If you really mean it, this can be the foundation of any statement. Many Psychoanalysts often point out that women often contradict themselves while expressing what they desire and do not desire in men. Though women publicly admit that they like men who are strong, secretly they like a man on whom she can wield certain amount of power. Well for all the men reading this article, the Billy Joel song
�She is always a woman for me� is how we would love to define her. No matter what, men will always enjoy the company of women. Let me now bring out certain points which women definitely find annoying in a man. Imagine your boyfriend calling you up every 15 minutes, when you are in the middle of a busy road. Regardless of how much you love your partner, this can become very irritating, as you would feel you are free to be on your own, due to the constant phone calls.
Now imagine you are on a first date and he starts talking about the amount of money that he has made in the stock markets or the new Ferrari that he has bought. I am sure more often than not a woman would not like to hear about these things on the first date.
While do talk about what they do for a living on first dates, it is usually considered annoying and ruse for someone to brag about their earnings. It is also likely (majority of the times) that a woman would not like a person who would show insensitivity towards her feelings. This is a mistake that many men make and women do not like this attitude from them.
There are many other factors that women generally do not like in men such as arrogance, lies, submissive behavior, etc.
Never ever show a woman that you have a weak character. This is one of the traits that women dislike in a man. It is a mistake that many men make by making a woman feel that he is ready to fall at her feet. Contrary to a man ,s thinking that a woman would appreciate it, women get annoyed with men who are too submissive and ready to do anything for her. This does not mean that a woman does not want a sensitive man who is open about his feelings, but it does mean that a woman still wants a man to be his own person, think for himself and claim what he wants from a relationship.
A woman, s relationship with a man is very delicate and she looks for a strong shoulder to rest her head.
A woman always likes a man who has a big heart and ready to share and care.
A self-centered man is rarely loved by women and more often than not will crave for female company.
You are setting yourself up for failure, if you show undue interest in other women when you are with a woman. This is a behavior that women dislike and will definitely put her off. Manipulative attitude is something that women dislike in a man. Hence, try to be as open in your behavior as possible and at the same time do not fall prey if she displays manipulative behavior. Keeping these points in mind, you can win over a woman.
Remember that love blossoms slowly and you need to give your woman time and space if you really want to win her over.
We have tried to explore few points that make a woman annoyed with a man. There may be many more and hence it is always advisable that you always be yourself when you are on your initial dates.
How to Get a Good Man It is not easy for women to find a good man, and to be honest it is not easy for a man to find a good woman.
This is written from a man's perspective to help frustrated women that are sincerely looking for a good man but keep finding losers.
Steps
1. Be yourself.
When you meet someone for the first time, you may be tempted to be someone you're not, such as "putting on your best face".
There's nothing wrong with wanting to make a good impression.
However, it is possible to take this too far and in turn repel men.
The same applies with myths about dressing sexy and excessive flirtation.
If you do not respect your body, you will only attract men who have a similar lack of respect for you and your body, and a good man will find it more difficult to take you seriously. Be yourself, and a real man will respect you.
2. Have a life.
Desperate, dramatic, and clingy relationships are often rooted in a feeling of need and desperation for a man to fill your life. Even if you have low self-esteem, but work over time to build it.
Pursue your goals, explore your passions, have an interesting life, do things that take you outside your boundaries. Don't put up a tough exterior to get over shyness; gradually learn to build trust with a network of people, so that your boyfriend isn't the only person you open up to and share your life with.
3. Be relaxed and cool.
Most guys hate it when girls are possessive, bitchy, clingy, controlling, etc. Learn to relax, and have fun. We all have too much going on in our lives; don't be the high maintenance "drama queen".
Having a woman around who makes life more difficult than enjoyable will make a man lose interest. If you do things like show genuine concern when the man has had a rough day, it will earn his respect and go toward winning him over and a good man will reciprocate.
Remember that most men, especially the good ones, are looking for someone with whom they can be comfortable, and not someone who is always intense.
4. Realize differences in communication.
Men can often miss the subtle messages that women send in their body language. Don't judge a guy because of this, it's just the way men are.
Subtle body language like smiles only make a man think that you might like him; he can't assume it means you're interested without being accused of being a self-absorbed jerk.
To drive the point home, gradually introduce more "obvious" body language like playful touches on the arm, playful banter and teasing, winks, inside jokes, playfulness, or (when you know him better) attempts to find a man's ticklish spots.
(Don't be afraid to kindly tease him over minor things - women who pretend a man is perfect are regarded as weak in their eyes.)
Flirting will not only show him you like him enough to get that physical and playful, but also help to break the physical barrier and allow a man to feel more comfortable making a few advances to you. But don't forget to look at how he is reacting to you.
5. Take a good look at yourself.
Psychological studies have shown that people seek out partners to fill a psychological void. Sometimes these voids are unhealthy, for example a woman who is unhealthy will actually seek out any man for the "high of seduction" or to get attention and feel desirable.
Look inside yourself and ask yourself why you want a man so bad, be truly honest with yourself, and if need be talk to a therapist about this.
A woman with issues only attracts a guy with issues as well, and a good, real man doesn't want anything to do with a woman who has more issues than TIME magazine.
If you want a good, healthy relationship with a real man, make certain that your own mental state and intentions are healthy.
6. Drop the games.
Nobody likes a partner who plays "head games". This is deceptive, and will hurt anybody who trusts you. Be real, don't play games, and good men will respect you and may even pursue you. Playing head games will only make good men run away. Remember the communication thing? That is especially true here.
If you like a guy, don't push him away and act like you don't like him. Tell him.
Yes, there are some men who do like the thrill of the chase, but all good men genuinely want to respect you and your wishes, and will leave you alone if you insist on it. Remember, men communicate directly, if you act like you don't want him, he'll think you don't want him.
7. Treat him with respect.
This is the most important thing of all. Men hate being around a woman who emasculates them, and a good man won't take long to leave such a woman.
Don't be afraid to help your man feel good about himself. A little known secret is that men are just as insecure as women. If he's with his friends or family be open to opportunities to let your man look like "the man". It will win his love and respect.
8. Don't be afraid to make a move.
Let's be real, a good man doesn't desperately need any woman, he would like to meet a good woman. If he's a good man, he will appreciate the compliment to his attractiveness, at the very least.
But remember that compliments are usually given to acquaintances - people who are intimate usually have a more honest connection, with playful teasing and banter.
Think of good relationships between brothers and sisters, parents and children, especially couples - they're always joking, laughing, teasing, flirting in a positive way. A woman who is always complimenting may simply be boring and look desperate.
Even if you are old-fashioned and never want to be the woman who asks a man for a date, you can still go out of your way to talk to him, and arrange to be with him.
Don't over do this, however; unless he is already attracted to you before the encounter, the more obvious it is that you've put a ton of time into the encounter without his direct encouragement, the more desperate and less attractive you look. Work on building attraction first.
9. Respect yourself.
If you say no, he should stop. If he doesn't stop, leave. Don't ever be uncomfortable saying no. Don't go against your morals to try to keep a guy. If you feel this is necessary, then either he's not a good man, or he is a good one but simply isn't a good match for you specifically (e. g. he is currently "playing the field" and is up front and honest about it, but you're looking for an exclusive relationship).
Don't be uncomfortable saying yes, either. If you feel the time is right, believe in your worth and don't worry that you're "giving yourself away."
You respect yourself and you're confident that he'll come back for more! A man who doesn't respect you in the morning never properly respected you to begin with, and a man who doesn't respect your wishes to wait is too impatient to make a good partner. Either way, find someone else.
10. Follow the Golden Rule.
That means apply the same rules to yourself that you'd apply to others, including him. Real men do in fact notice this, they just don't scream it out.
For example, if you do want to try finding his ticklish spots, then don't complain one bit if he tries finding yours in return. Don't go on about how you "don't NEED no man!" or about "men this, men that" if you don't want him treating you the same way.
DO, on the other hand, treat him--and others--with respect, dignity, and honor. Others will notice, too, and who knows--if they know you want a good, real man but don't yet have one, they just might introduce you to one!
11. Don't Be Clingy.
This means don't show that you love this person by being near them all the time they need space and they need to know that you don't want to follow them everywhere you go and they need to know that you have your own life.
Tips
* A good way to meet someone is through other people, or activities you enjoy. Some advice about being genuine: Don't take up hobbies or habits just to meet someone. If you meet him in a bar, he's liable to be a drinker. If you meet him in a house of worship, he's likely to be religious. First impressions are important, so if his first impression of you is "party girl", it will be difficult to change. The same thing goes for if his first impression of you is "uptight girl" or "mind-game girl".
* Practice the Golden Rule. If you want him to do something, you should be equally willing to do it yourself. You want him to ask you out or take you out or do whatever else for you? You should be equally willing, and don't wait for or expect him to do it first. Good men respect a woman who applies the same rules to herself that she would apply to a man.
Warnings
* Always give a man his space when he needs it - never come between a man and his friends, asking him to choose - he will ultimately resent you for it, even if he initially chooses you.
* Remember - interesting men look for interesting women. Make sure your life is about more than just him.
I'm waiting... It seems simple enough, but it can be the most difficult part of a date. So what do you do? Biggest clue: THINK AHEAD You don't want to be standing there going, "Um, ah." when the object of your affection says "Yes." You can't just looked stunned and be too shocked to utter the next sentence. You can't wait for that very moment to try to think of what on earth you can do on a date. You need a more impressive beginning.
Why'd I say that! If you're at the start of a relationship or asking for a first date, take the pressure off by not using the "D" word. Don't ask for a "Date" and don't call it a "Date." If you're uncomfortable saying, "Would you like to go out with me."
Then don't say it. Make it casual. But (just a reminder)THINK AHEAD. Make it specific.
First - two deadly questions NOT to ask:
Do not ask, "You want to go out?" it's too open-ended and can lead to awkward follow up conversation.
Do not ask, "What are you doing Friday night?"
It's too vague. It may leave your potential date wondering exactly what you have in mind. The other person doesn't know if you're just curious about what she/he is doing on Friday night or if you want to do something with them... Try something along the lines of: "You like to rollerblade? I was thinking of going out to the lake on Saturday. It's great out there. Would you like to go with me?" Or if you're really uncertain or uncomfortable about getting together - go with a group. Ask the question: "Hey, there're a bunch of us going bowling on Saturday. Would you like to go?" The operative word here is "us." It immediately takes the pressure off. Planning activities to do on your date and getting together in a group are good ways to go - especially if you think you or your date might get "tongue-tied." If you're busy or there are a bunch of other people in the conversation, you won't hit awkward silences and won't have to talk all the time if you don't know your date very well.
In summary, just remember when you are asking someone out:
1) Plan ahead Know what you are going to say AND what you want to suggest to do on the date.
2) Be specific The other person will be much more comfortable if they know exactly what your intentions are and what you want to do.
AND try to relax and enjoy yourself - worst case - they'll say they can't go out and you'll find someone else who will. Someone who appreciates you. In other words, if the person you are asking out doesn't have enough insight to recognize what a terrific person you are, then they're just not too bright now, are they?
If either of these girls (on the left or right) walks up to you, looks into your eyes for 10 seconds, then asks, "Could you tell me the time?" You REALLY think she wants to know what time it is? If you're a straight guy - and you give her the time of day and walk away, you REALLY need to learn more about BODY LANGUAGE. =) Okay, now women. This guy walks up to you slowly, keeps his eyes on you, then says, "Excuse me. Do you know where I can mail a letter around here?" You think he's desperate to find a post office? Think about it. He's smiling openly and approaching slowly with his head tilted. Hallooo! Offer to show him the way - walk with him -especially if it's a few blocks away! Think. Always be ready and aware! You never know when the perfect opportunity might be standing there in front of you. That's WHY understanding body language can REALLY pump up your love life! Body language is the quiet, secret and most powerful language of all! According to experts, our non-verbal language communicates about 50% of what we really mean (voice tonality contributes 38%) while words themselves contribute a mere 7%. Our bodies send out messages constantly and often we don't recognize that we're communicating a lot more than we realize. Our understanding and use of non-verbal cues in facial expression are familiar to us nearly from birth By familiarizing ourselves with a few basic nonverbal signals, we can improve our ability to understand what people are really communicating and become aware of what we are broadcasting to the world with our own non-verbal cues. A person's body posture, movements and positions more often tell us exactly what they mean (which may be the exact opposite of what they are saying). Many people are unaware of how loudly they communicate with their bodies. This guy might as well stand up, wave his arms and scream, "I'm a lousy cheat! Please - flunk me, now!" Our use and reading of body language is largely unconscious. We understand what a person indicates with their gestures and body positions and we send out our own messages - but we rarely stop to think about how we do it. Often when a person is considered to have great intuition about other people, their understanding is actually due to careful observation of individuals, and conscious or unconscious understanding of non-verbal communication. These people can see and interpret verbal and non-verbal language due to training or years of observation and analysis of people. We need to recognize and give credibility to our own "intuition" and "feelings" about a person or situation. One of the most basic instances involves our personal "space." We notice that when a stranger or someone gets too close, we feel uncomfortable. Unconsciously we know the distancing from others that is appropriate for our own culture. Every day we judge our own distance and respect the space of others by avoiding getting too close and follow our "feeling" to adjust to the correct distances from friends as opposed to acquaintances or strangers.
Be creative. Take a little time to think it through. A three-hour date with a movie that lasts two and a half-hours is not a good way to get acquainted. Then again, you don't want to be stuck staring at each other without a topic of conversation. A daytime meeting takes the heat off. Lunch or coffee is a good start (If you want to checkout a local spot to meet for lunch, you can go to Dine.com, enter your zip code and get ratings for restaurants in your area.) Even better - a trip to the zoo. Plenty of topics for discussion without having to deal with issues like: "What happened to your last relationship?" And you can avoid the usual casual chit-chat like: "My wife is still missing." "I met my first boyfriend on the prison bus." Yada. Yada. Yada. Clothing
Clothing is not optional. Wear clothes that make you feel good. New clothes always help - but if not new, be sure they're clean, pressed, and fit well - or if that's not your style - be sure they fit whatever way makes you feel the most comfortable and still look presentable.
Help the Other Person Feel Comfortable
Find something nice about your date and compliment her or him. But mean it. Don't just say, "Nice shoes, Gladys." "Swell belt, Ralph." Let's review. Find something nice. If it's painfully difficult to come up with something that you sincerely like about the person, you shouldn't be out with them in the first place.
Manners and/or Kindness
Thank the other person for the date - always, without exception. Good manners are still in style. Well, not necessarily good manners - but common sense. Human kindness. That sort of thing is always in style.
Focus on the Other Person - pay attention to your date. No wandering eyes. No preoccupation with old relationships, work, bank robberies. Be THERE.
Listen actively to what your date says. Don't interrupt. While your date is talking, don't spend time thinking about what you're going to say when it's your turn.
Attitudes and Habits - stay positive. Don't complain on a first date. Be cautious about alcohol - if you drink heavily, you're not going to be at your best. If your date gets swacked on your first date, it's not necessarily due to nervousness. He or she is likely to be a heavy-drinker, at best, and could end up drooling on your new, pressed clothes as you shovel him or her into a cab.
Date ideas for the week:
Take a class together. Wine-tasting? Photography? Or cut to the chase with a massage class.
