Romance on a budget

One of the most common topics in arguments between couples is money. Worrying about having enough money to care for your family’s needs can put a huge burden on your shoulders, and that financial burden leads to enormous stress. Focusing on the stress of finances can oftentimes knock relationship priorities off the top of the list. We have to remember that our marriages are the cornerstone of our frugal families. If we fail to take care of our relationships, then all the frugalness in the world won’t matter anymore. It makes sense then that frugal couples need to be mindful of the state of their marriages and the quality of their time together. Always make sure that time for romance and your relationship are a top priority, no matter what is going on in your budget! You have the power to foster love and rekindle the romance in your marriage right now, and it doesn’t take a lot of money to make that happen. I believe that husband and wife date nights are a great way to stay connected. You can keep romance alive on a small budget, or even no budget, when you focus on the things that really make your spouse feel loved, valued, and appreciated. Plan fun things to do together such as an indoor picnic or an at-home romantic dinner for two. Or what about taking an evening stroll holding hands and talking about your day? If you have little ones and you can't seem to find the time to really talk but you also can't afford a babysitter, you might consider going on a romantic nighttime drive. This is a date even the kids will like (before they fall asleep, that is)! Have the kids get dressed in their jammies and bring their pillows and blankies into the car. Go for a nighttime drive (the kids will fall asleep) together to talk about non-kid topics. Load up your favorite romantic music or even “your song”, and drive to a scenic lookout point where you can see the city and stare out at the stars together. You don’t need to have a special occasion to make plans for a romantic date with your husband or wife. Keeping regular free and cheap dates on your weekly schedule serves to strengthen your relationship and keep your intimacy strong in a fun way. Spending time together doesn't have to cost a lot, just use your imagination and you can keep your romance alive on a budget!
-- Danelle Barbi Ice from Homemakerbarbi

Obsessive Girlfriend

Avoid Being an Obsessive Girlfriend
One of the most amazing traits in women is our ability to submerge ourselves into the man of our desire.
Women become attached emotionally, some very quickly, and assume that the man shares these same feelings and desires. However, this can be a sure fire way to push the "man of your dreams" out of your life.

1. Accept him. Only by accepting him as he is, do you have such deep respect and gratitude for him that you would never want him to change in any way for you. He has so much to offer you if only you give him the space to be himself.

2. Give him space. If he wants to hang out with friends, encourage it. Let him know that you want him to have a good time and to spend as much time with them as he'd like.
(Then follow step 4.) If you have to, fake it. There are times when you would really rather spend that time with your man than have him out with his friends, however forcing him to spend time with you results in his pulling further away. If you're able to encourage and support his time away it will reinforce his belief that you want what is best for him, and in the long run it will strengthen your relationship. Patience is the key here. One's got to believe that in the long run he will surely appreciate it.

3. Take time for yourself. Visit friends, family, take a class, anything you find interesting or would like to learn. Do this even if you have to tear yourself away from your man. He should be supportive of you, and encourage your interests, too. Focusing only on the one you love isn't living; it's also about personal growth and experiencing new things. Taking time for yourself isn't selfish. If you aren't the best person you can be, then you can't expect to be the person you need to be for your significant other.

4. Keep your hobbies and friends. All of us tend to become obsessive at the beginning of a relationship. The key to a healthy relationship is balance. Couples need time apart to reestablish their individual identities. Remind yourself of who you are by reconnecting with friends/relatives, or picking up those old hobbies you've been setting aside. Suggest that he do the same. This is a simple way to show him that you are confident and interesting (even if you don't feel very confident or interesting). Suggest to him that he go out with his friends while you visit with yours. Or even suggest he work on his hobby or interest while you take time for yours.

5. Set up days or times to reconnect after spending time apart. This is simple and very effective. After asking for time apart, set up a time and day to reconnect. For instance, if one of you wants to hang out with friends for the day, suggest that you could meet him later for dinner. Or suggest a time the following day, and an activity, in which the both of you could get together. This gives both people in the relationship permission to enjoy their time apart, while also giving each of you a grounding point, or rather a reassurance in knowing you will see the other person and they wish to see you.

6. Reaffirm who you are and why you are special. Do those things that you do best. If you're not sure, try everything. If you're feeling less than confident, or insecure in your relationship, sometimes it helps to go back to something that created a sense of accomplishment. Don't look for confidence from your partner, find it within yourself. To do this, seek out those things at which you can succeed.

7. Suggest he take time for his hobbies and interests. The key is to allow him to choose by assuring him you want to spend time with him, but letting him know you understand the importance of his hobbies and interests, too. Let him know that you can and will find activities to occupy yourself while he enjoys his time. This frees him from feeling guilty for taking that time for himself. You create a bonding situation by suggesting that the both of you go to stores that are of interest to him. For example, if he enjoys video games, suggest a trip to the video game store. Help him look for games he wants, or maybe is interested in. Then give him space to use those games.

8. Know when to back off. Learn his body language. Ask questions. Listen to what he is saying. Men don't always come out and say how they feel, and may not tell you even if you ask. Listen to what your gut instinct is telling you. If you feel he is pulling away, don't force yourself on him more. A woman's tendency is to be clingier at this point. The problem is it drives men away. A possible solution involves letting him know you are available when he wants, while finding other things to do with your time, or discuss the situation with him.

Tips

* Hang up the phone. If you're calling him 24 hours a day, stop. In worst case scenarios, turn your phone off. It's okay to call and see how his day is, but if you're calling every couple of hours, this could reinforce his belief that you have nothing else going on in your life. People are attracted to interesting people. If your only interest is him, then he's going to lose interest in you. Some ideas to refrain from grabbing the phone are: Call a friend, take a nap, go for a walk and pick flowers for him, learn something new that you can discuss with him later, learn more about his hobbies/interests through research.

* Start a journal. Write your feelings, not what you did during the day. Try to discover why you feel a certain way. Insecurity often leads people to act in ways that men would describe as crazy. If you're worried about losing him, dig deep into why you feel that way. Not how is he acting, but why YOU are concerned about losing him. Fear of being alone? Fear of rejection? A journal is a place where you can explore your thoughts and feelings without having to set them in stone. It should be an area where you can express every possible emotion without fearing recrimination. Once on paper, re-examine it, does it still sound true to you? What can you do so that you won't fear rejection or loneliness, and can become more confident in who you are? Oh, and make sure he doesn't find it. It could turn into a sticky situation.

* Stop following him when you aren't together. Don't follow him when he says he's going to a friend's house so that you can check up on him. This is an instant message to him that you don't trust him. Men aren't stupid; they see your car parked down the street.

* Create situations that have an ending point. For instance, you want to hang out with him during the afternoon, ask him if he's interested and then suggest that after the outing he can drop you off at your house. This gives him the freedom to decide if he would like to spend the rest of the evening with you, instead of feeling as if he's trapped into spending it with you.

* Communication. Ask questions and then listen. Clarify anything you may not understand by asking questions.

* Quality time, not quantity time. Use the time you do have together wisely. Ask yourself if you'd rather have 8 hours of mediocre time with him, or 2 hours of fantastic time together.

* Trust. Obsessive behavior usually stems from a feeling of mistrust. Unfortunately trust can only be built over time, but you must have a basis to build from. If you don't feel you can trust him while he is away, discuss this with him. Also, ask yourself why you feel this way. What is he doing to cause this mistrust in you? Is it his actions, or are you drawing from past experiences? What can you do to help yourself face this fear?

* Approach all arguments or discussions with an open mind. Be willing to listen and understand his side.

* Remember that each relationship is different, and no two people are alike.

* In general, without realizing it, we tend to be attracted to people who show the better qualities that are within human beings. Love, beauty, courage, kindness, confidence, trust, honesty and friendliness are some of these qualities and there are many more. When we live out our best qualities, we tend to be attracted to and we attract others who do the same. We tend to want to avoid people who live out some of the worse qualities. When was the last time you were attracted to bitterness, meanness and cruelty in a person?

* Dont instantly say yes to every one of his ideas. You will seem desperate, but instead say no, and casually suggest something or wait for another one of his. Doing this will seem as if you want to spend time with him, but are still enjoying your own life as well.

* Seek help if you are in an abusive situation, or if you find that your infatuation with this person is consuming your life.

* Letting him have his space to do things like be with his friends doesn’t give him permission to pursue other women.

* Setting a "curfew" of when a man is supposed to be home or is supposed to check in is extremely controlling behavior. As you probably know, when you're out with your friends, time flies and the last thing on your mind is the time. You are not his mother, and asking him to keep checking his watch all night while he's trying to have fun just makes you something to resent. He should, instead, have his fun so that he can recharge his batteries and look forward to seeing you.

* Men don't "get a life" by dating. You shouldn't, either. Your life should be interesting and full on its own. If you're not genuinely going out and having fun with your friends without obsessing about him, your insecurities are controlling your life.

* Don't be his go-to girl, just because he cannot find anything else to do. Be smart. Be real.

* If staying out late with his friends is about more than just getting in some guy time—remember: you can’t force love. If what you have isn’t meant to be, no amount of angry outbursts over his guy-time will make your relationship work.

* All of these suggestions should not be tried from the point of view that these will fix a relationship that isn't working by "making" someone have more feelings. Relationships are built on feelings for the other person, and love comes only from loving.
If you find yourself following these suggestions in order to elicit a specific response, then it could be because you're wanting to make the other person feel and in turn, show you feelings they might not have. If you're wondering what you can do to make someone have more feelings for you, the answer is confidently being yourself without needing him. Ask yourself, 'What is it really that attracts you to this person? - the person, themselves, or one or two qualities they have.

* Never just assume that your boyfriend is cheating on you and start checking up on him. That is very annoying, and you will be very embarrassed if he isn't after all. Not only that, but if you are insistent, don't be surprised if he then begins to cheat - both because you don't trust him and because he wants to get away from you.

* Don't be clingy. Men who are starting to feel serious about a girl may start to pull away and make sure. If you're too clingy during this important time, you might chase him away just as he's about to commit.wikihow.com

The right man for me?

Perhaps you have been dating a man who seems to be very caring, loving & supportive. You wonder & want to seek relationship advice, "Is he the right man for me?"

How do you know if Mr. Right is going to be that man who will be willing to commit to a meaningful relationship & is a person who you can feel comfortable with for the rest of your life?

Here are a few guidelines that might help you make that decision.

When relationships begin, each person is putting on their best face. Of course we don't want the other person to know that down deep inside of us, we are really insecure & have characteristics about ourself that we keep hidden. It is not until the relationship becomes committed or the legal binding of marriage occurs that it is safe to begin to allow that aspect to surface, with less fear that your partner is going to leave you. This is true for everyone on some level, whether one is conscious or unconscious about those insecurities.

It is common for that shadow side to surface after a commitment is made in the relationship, leaving feelings of disappointment. The biggest flaws will be the deepest hidden. There are qualities of a man to look for that will let you know that your man is capable of sustaining a healthy relationship. And this indeed forms the relevant part of relationship advice.

How does your man handle conflict or resolve differences?

Does he become quiet and refuse to discuss the problem?
Or is he willing to communicate about the differences & help to resolve the situation in a loving way?

Communication is essential to a successful relationship. If your man shows signs of withdrawing, pouting, or becomes angry when a conflict arises, it is a major sign of emotional immaturity.

Both partners need to be able to address a problem by sharing their views & emotions without blaming the other. You cannot resolve a problem if he refuses to talk about it or isn't emotionally connected well enough to know what he is feeling. If there is no possibility of conflict, then perhaps the intimacy in the relationship may not be easily established. That doesn't mean that conflict is necessary, but it does mean that he should be willing to take the initiative to openly discuss difficult/controversial subjects & move out of any conflicting situation very easily. The relationship will then deepen.

Does your man value your happiness?

A successful relationship is maintained by both the partners by respecting & honoring their love by committing to each other's best interests. If you are with a man who doesn't cherish your love, but is only concerned with his own happiness, be very wary. He should be willing to go beyond his own self interests & see the worth of honoring those values that you aspire to & hold dear. If you value financial responsibility then his life should show his commitment to a job & being sensible with debt. And if family values are important to you then he must spend maximum time with the family. The relationship advice will be that your happiness must be his priority.

Is your man considerate?

A man should be dependable. Does he show up when he says he will? Does he say he is going to call & you don't hear from him? You should be able to know that he stands by his word & you can trust him to be there when he says he is.

To be in a successful relationship you should be able to lean on your man, knowing that he will be willing to be there for you. Thus you will never feel the need of any relationship advice.

--advice from Dr Rakesh Chopra, http://www.DrRakeshChopra.com .

Why I Love You

Why I Love You
Figure this: You are giving a bouquet of gorgeous roses to your beloved. You expect a generous hug, a peck on the cheek, or at least a warm "thank you".
Instead you are asked, "Why do you love me?" To answer these spur of the moment questions, we bring you reasons to love someone. So prepare yourself with these "reasons for loving you" and answer the question that begins with reasons why I love you! Given here are top 20 of the most popular reasons that we came up, to answer this often asked question.

* You complete me.
* You give the word Perfect a new meaning
* I can be myself when I am with you
* You bring out the best in me.
* Just a sight of you lifts my up spirits.
* You have taught me what it is to love and be loved.
* I can be clumsy and foolish when I am with you, yet know that your love for me will never diminish.
* Your smile is enough to make a dull day seem bright as sun.
* Being in your arms makes me feel like I can never be lost again.
* Ever since you have come into my life, I yearn to come back home and see your lovely smile.
* Your innocence makes me forget all shady things of this world.
* I love the way you get angry whenever I am late; yet wait for me for as long as it takes.
* You have given meaning to my existence.
* I love the way your face glows whenever I gift you something.
* You are the only one who can make me smile even in my deepest sorrows.
* I respect the faith you have in me and love you for it.
* I love the calm look on your face when you are sleeping.
* I love waking up in the morning and finding you by my side.
* I get lost in the depth of your mysterious eyes.
* I can fight against the world because I know you will be by my side always.
taken from here.

Communicate With a Guy After He Rejected You

How to Communicate With a Guy After He Rejected You

You liked him and he talked to you a whole lot. Then,you gave it a try, thinking he would never hurt you. But, you were wrong. You might still like him, and might still want to talk. It might be awkward, but if you try this, it's gonna be fine.
How to Make Men Commit
Learn this 1 big mistake you make that makes men fear commitment.

1. Wait for the right time. Wait until he is comfortable. It may take weeks, or maybe months, to gather up your courage, so wait for that time. Once you feel okay, you can move on.
2. Make the effort. Slowly start to sit closer to him in classes. Stand by him in lines. Talk to his friends. Make sure you glance at him in classes. And if he stares back, it's a pretty good chance he might want to talk. So, make him think your not afraid of talking with him. Now, move on.
3. Ask your friends to sit by you and talk to them like crazy. It will catch his eye. Be funny and care-free. Then, you can say something really ditzy, and hit it off. When he looks your way, start laughing and say "Well, that was really stupid!" and he likely will respond. Or, you can sing a song he knows. Make him sing too.
4. Start looking at him more. Talk to him. Make the effort. Act like he's one of your friends.
5. Be yourself! You can dress nicer and all, but just keep in mind, he might like you for you more than you think!
6. Don't see it as an opportunity to win him over, see it as an opportunity to reestablish communication and/or friendship.
7. After something so hard, give yourself time and him, so you can get rid of the awkwardness. Once you're ready, just get to know him better, as a friend. Send him small messages like 'what's up?', and it will show him that you guys are cool. And who knows? Maybe trying to befriend him will one day make him fall for you, and see what he missed out on.

* Just be friendly. Eventually if he gives hints that he likes being friends with you, you might take it up a step.
* Remember! Be comfy with him, but don't go over-board.
* Try not to give him too much of your time. When someone rejects you, it's because they're not interested, and you have to accept it. It may hurt a lot, but just keep in mind he is the one missing out, not you.
* If you're friends with the guy or became friends with him, DON'T bring up the rejection again. It only makes things a bit uncomfortable and you will regret it. It just makes him feel bad that he had to reject you, because you weren't his type, and makes it seem like you can't let go of the past.

Things You'll Need :
* Humor
* A smile
* Confidence
* Yourself ---taken from www.wikihow.com

If we act good and treat him well, i think that's all enough, beside we have to be honest to ourself.
Just show your love as a friend if he looks uncomfortable with what we did in the past.
Love have patient and full of respect of ourself and him.
Let your love enroll from your heart, but you must keep control its flow. You will reconcile your relationship with him.
And nothing to lose, if you can not have him as your lover, you can have him as good friend, and the most , you have learnt how to be honest to your feel and let your pure love enroll from your heart. Once, you will have right man loves you as you never think before.

Choose Between Two Girls

Choose Between Two Girls

Look...It's happened. You like two girls, maybe you're going out with one of them, maybe they both like you, maybe they don't. It's just that they're waiting for you to make that decision their waiting, and you'd better choose one before you lose both.


Dont think things are going to work themselves out when you are choosing between two girls if you just let things go then you will be unhappy without the one you want.

1. Analyze your relationship with both girls. What do you actually want from each of the girls?
Just a physical relation?
Marriage?
A fun time?
Soul mate?
This is a very important decision, or you'll be stuck with something you don't want.
2. What does one girl have that the other one doesn't?
If both are good looking, which one do you enjoy being with more?
Which one are you more compatible with?
Who do you have better conversations with?
Who has the better family?
Who do you have the most fun with?
Who does your mother like the best?(She knows you the best so she will know who's best for you, whether she knows the girls or not)
Who do you try new things with (this is important if you are thinking about a long term relationship, a key factor is to have someone who keeps things light and wont get boring.)Answer all of these questions before moving on.

1. Make a table with one column for each girl, and list as many good qualities as you can think of.
2. Locate any qualities that both girls share, and cross them off the list. You are now left with a list of unique qualities that each girl has. Review these qualities and compare which ones you like best. The girl with the most and best unique qualities is most likely the one you should choose. Also if you want list the bad qualities and the one with the least bad qualities is also most likely the one you should choose.
3. Once you make your decision, be direct about it. Do not flip flop between the girls. Girls love it when you're direct. Girls love actions. Do something in front of her friends (they probably think you are a jerk.)Remember actions speak louder than words. Figure out where she is one night and surprise Go up to her and just tell her, "I can't bear to be without you." She'll melt. They go for that stuff, once in a while. Also remember anything can be fixed.


* If you aren't satisfied with the steps above, pick whichever girl you have the most in common with.
* Let the other girl down easy. Talk to her and explain the predicament. The worst thing you can do is ignore her or bottle the feelings.
* If you've chosen already and believe you have chosen wrongly, go back and fix your mistakes. It'll take some time and some bonding, but you'll be better for it.
* Not all girls are the same, some may fall for stupid silly tricks, some may not.

* Don't let the girls know you are observing them for unique traits! They will certainly put on a show if they know you are watching. You need to determine their real qualities.
* You're unlikely to be able to see both of them at the same time. If you play with both, you may lose them both. Play one, and keep something up your sleeve should it fall through. Don't lose both girls needlessly, when one will do.
* You can't have strong feelings for one person while you're going out with someone else. It'll ruin the relationship you do have.
* If you actually say "I can't bear to live without you", make sure you say it seriously, or else most likely they will laugh.

How to love

How to Love

Love is a strange thing. It can be the most amazing feeling in the world, or it can really hurt, but in the end love is something most, if not all of us, will face. While there are many different ways to define love and there are many different ways to love someone (even yourself), here is a general guide to loving.

1. Say it. When you say the words "I Love You," do they carry it with them the desire to show someone you love them or do they carry it with them is it what you want to feel? And when you say it make sure you really mean it and are willing to do anything for that special person.

2. Empathize. Put yourself in someone else's shoes. Rather than impose your own expectations or attempt to control them, try to understand how they feel, where they come from, and who they are; and realize how they could also love you back just as well.

3. Love unconditionally.
If you cannot love another person without attaching stipulations, then it is not love at all, but deep-seated opportunism (one who makes the most of an advantage, often unmindful of others). If your interest is not in the other person as such, but rather in how that person can enhance your experience of life, then it is not unconditional. If you have no intention of improving that person’s life, or allowing that person to be themselves and accepting them as they are, and not who you want them to be, then you are not striving to love them unconditionally.

4. Expect nothing in return.
That doesn't mean you should allow someone to mistreat or undervalue you. It means that giving love does not guarantee receiving love. Try loving just for loving's sake. Realize that someone may have a different way of showing his or her love for you; do not expect to be loved back in exactly the same way.

5. Realize it can be lost.
If you realize that you can lose the one you love, then you have a greater appreciation of what you have. Think how lucky you are to have someone to love.


* It does not make you a bad person to desire someone else's love, even if they do not love you. However, to truly love someone, you must let them be free. It is selfish to blame them for your feelings.
* There are many types of love, for example: a mother-son love is different from a best friend's love, which is different from a romantic love. Don't be ashamed to tell anyone that you love your friends as much as you love anyone else in your life.
* You have to find someone that will suit you, someone you feel comfortable with - not just someone to make love to.
* As a word, love can be found worldwide and is often used to describe compassion and/or emotional attachment. Accepting those you love for who they are is part of love. You also need to learn to accept yourself before you can accept another. If you cannot love your self, how are you to love another?
* Love genuinely. Do not compare your feelings now to what your feelings were when you were with another mate. At times, we can experience rejection.
* Realize that love is a feeling and attempt to assist, but ultimately, you are the one who must take action in order to discover love.
* Do things that make the other person feel good, but do not smoother them with gifts and attention.
* Consider some tips about what people in love do.
o People in love are sensitive to each other's needs, and endeavor to meet them even when they do not feel like doing it.
o Men and women may be equal in value but different by nature.

People who truly are in love give their mates "space" to develop their potential and find their fulfillment in life.

Sometimes love is all we need
o Love does not brag. People who are truly in love refrain from rehearsing their good traits just to show off. Bragging in a relationship often is really defensiveness.
o People who are truly in love do not insist that their way is best and demand that their mates give in to them.
o People who are truly in love are considerate of each others feelings and courteous in their actions toward one another. Sadly sarcasm is a way of life for some couples. They ridicule each other, belittle each other and trade jibes with a fury. They may say it is all in fun, but it leaves wounds that will someday become festering sores.
o People who are truly in love look out for their mates' best interests as much as their own. Those in love should be concerned not only about their own individual interests, but about the interests of the other as well.
o People who truly love control their anger when the other displeases them. We are all human, and all humans feel anger periodically, but we only express our anger in destructive ways when we counting on someone else to meet our needs.
o People who truly love each other do not take pleasure in their mates' disappointments or failures.
o People who truly love each other treat their mates with absolute trust. Some husbands and wives torment themselves with groundless suspicions. If you look for trouble you will find it every time.
o People who truly love look forward to their relationship growing more meaningful and precious. They have hope. Which is an attitude that happily anticipates the good. It isn't being blind and denies there are problems, but it does look beyond the problems. People who truly love each other do not allow their problems to rob them of their happiness.
* Remember there is no failure in love, because once you tell somebody who you love, that you love him/her, then you have already succeeded in love.

* You must love yourself before you can love another.
* There is always the risk of getting hurt, but that's part of letting yourself fully love and trust some one. Being hurt could be long-lasting and could hurt more than anything in the world.
* Realize what you have while you have it, and care for the person you trust.
* If something comes to an end, try to let go rather than holding on; it's for the best.
* The idea of love is fueled by childhood fantasies. The love shown in movies, as obtainable as it may be, is rare to say the least.
* You just may find your soul-mate sooner than you want to.
* If you feel any doubt of love your partner has for you, it is probably true. when you give and receive love 100%, you will have no doubt in your heart.
* Don't ask for love - you should receive love because your partner wants to give you love - not because you want it from your partner.
* Do not force love - it will come in good time, it will come.

Believe. God will give you in best time. Learn to love your self and learn to love other in right way. Soon, you'll find your soulmate.

Love Hurts

How love hurts and several quotes from well known authors regarding how much pain a feeling of love can cause.


Love is great when it is fresh and happening and when you feel it slipping away, both the times love makes us feel there is nothing like love in our life. Though love gives a certain high at the time when both of you are feeling the same things, there is nothing more painful that your love going away.love hurts

Love hurts so much that at times it leaves you in depth of sadness which is certainly larger than the high of happiness it gave you. A breakup is the thing about love, a reason that prompts many to avoid being in love. Many simply ignore the realization that they are in love because they dread the time when this feeling will wear itself off and the remains of love will be torn to shred by arguments and fights and usual drifting away.

Many famous people have fallen in love again and again only to grow apart and feel the sadness that love tends to give after it goes away. There are very less numbers of people who have not experienced love and almost all who have experienced love have experienced the heartbreak that follows love, bar a few lucky ones. Many writers have expressed their feelings about how love hurts in most apt way and that is through quotes.


As famous poet and writer Oscar Wilde puts it, “when one is in love, one always begins by deceiving oneself, and one always ends by deceiving others, that is what the world calls romance.”

Love is blind and has been proven more than one time, often couples in love do not see stark differences that are obvious to others in their personality. Love often makes people do things and act in certain ways, that are surprising to others as well as themselves, heart wants to love whether or not brains allows it, therefore, rational decision making rarely takes place when people are in love.

There are quotes made by other famous literary giants like William Shakespeare who wrote “The courses of true love never did run smooth!” this happens to be true too, most passionate love affairs have ended up rather tragically, with either the couple breaking up with some one causing the breakup or one among the couple passing away. Whenever there is true love there is no dearth of troubles coming its way.

There is another quote from an anonymous author who quotes, “Why is it always that we don’t know when love happens, and we always know the moment it ends?” True some people though they do recognize the feeling of love, and they know that they are in love tend to ignore it to the extent they can. It is mere fear of the break up and the denial that love cannot happen to them makes them react in such a way to love, however whenever love has ended we accept it and face it faster than we recognized it.

End of love means end of the world for some, where people are unable to comes to terms with the end in relationship often get depressed and are more likely to try drastic methods since they cannot stand the pain end of relationship brings together. There is a proverb that proves love to be a truthful thing it is “where there is love there is pain”. Love can bring up pain in different forms not just through break up.

Love gives pain whenever your beloved is in pain or suffering. Love ensures that you will suffer as much or maybe more when your beloved is suffering just because you cannot do anything to ease out the pain and the emotional turbulence your beloved is going through.

Another quote by William Shakespeare proves how difficult it can be to comes to terms with a breakup, he quotes “Love is a smoke made with the fumes of sighs.” This quote speaks so much about feeling of losing out on something precious that a breakup tends to bring. No wonder people who have been through this feeling sigh away their sadness.

All pain that there is in love is given all the more aptly by George Granville, who writes “Of all pains, the greatest pain, is to love, and to love in vain.” Whenever feelings of love are not reciprocated or the relationship that one values so much is not valued equally by the partner, definitely the feeling of loving in vain would come. The feeling of not being esteemed as much as you esteemed another person will surely cause pain.

Love hurts through different ways, you can be in love and with the one you love and still be hurt, or a breakup in a relationship can hurt. It does not take a long time to end a relationship, but it surely takes a lifetime to forget someone you once loved so dearly.

Into you or not?

It is said that the love of a man for woman could be recognized very easily but it is very difficult to define it.

There are no clear-cut formulae to explain love. However, here are a few tips that had been provided by people who are supposed to be knowledgeable in matters of love.

* The man can't seem to stop talking to you everyday.
* He is not dating anybody else except you.
* He starts treating your mother the way he treats his own mother.
* He starts using possessive words like "we", "our", and "us" more during conversations with you, particularly when he is talking about the future.
* He is keeping a photo of yours on his desk.
* He starts keeping your favorite food items in his refrigerator.
* He bestows top priority to you over his work and other relationships.
* He keeps saying nice things about you when he talks to his friends.
* He does all your errands without the least hesitation.
* He keeps looking at you in the most admiring way even when prettier women are around.

Remember that love in real life is not as easy as it is shown in movies.

When a man is in love with you, the chances of breaking up are much higher. Even ordinary actions assume enormous importance in love, whether they are positive or negative. Hence, when you think that a man is in love with you, you should handle the entire matter with kid gloves.

Start taking a genuine interest in what he likes and dislikes, his tastes, habits, etc. It helps you in understanding him better. Further, with such knowledge, you would be able to avoid rubbing him the wrong way, which is as important as pleasing him. When a man loves you, he starts giving lot of importance to you. Open flirting might not always mean that the man loves you but the bestowal of more attention to what you say and what you like is a definite sign of love. He would hasten to act all your requests, irrespective of the time of the day. Even if you call him at 2-00 a.m. in the morning and tell him that you have headache but out of stock of the medication, he would rush to a 24-hour drugstore, get the medicine and come to your place with that.

It is very difficult for men to show their love in an open manner. Even the most courageous man would become a coward when it comes to the woman he loves. His speech would be halting and hesitant. He would start to say something, stop, think it over again and then utter what is in his mind.

It is because he is just getting to know you better and still not sure whether you would like what he says. Even though women are usually more guarded in the initial stages, men are equally nervous around the women they love. However, the man who is in love with you would take extra steps in pleasing you. He would groom his hair and straighten his dress more often, when he is with you. Such acts reveal that he wants to look good for you.

Take a mental note of them. He would talk to you in a low voice so that others would not be able to hear what he says. This would mean that he wants the conversation to be exclusively between him and you. He would compliment you not only in person but also to his friends. He would speak highly of you to others. He would go the extra mile in showing respect to your mother, if you happen to introduce her to him. He would call you several times a day without any special reason.

Whenever he is talking about the future, he would tend to use words like "we", "us", and "our" than "I", "me", and "mine". Use of such words is a sure sign of his planning a future long-term relationship with you. He would be keeping your photo on his work desk as well as in his room. He would be stocking all the food and beverage items that you like, so that you are not disappointed at any time, if you are hungry when you are at his place. He would tend to look at you in an admiring way whenever he is with you.

While you are leaving, he would keep looking at your back till you disappear from his view. He would arrive early for a meeting and would leave after you, if he is not accompanying you to your place. Even when he drops you at your home, he would wait till you have entered the house and closed the door before leaving. All these telltale signs would definitely show that the man is in love with you and desires a long-term relationship with you. Act positively and let not this chance pass you by.

Love Stories

A girl and a boy were on a motorcycle, speeding through the night. They loved each other a lot.....
Girl:"slow down a little.. I'm scared.."
Boy: "No, it's so fun.."
Girl: "please..it's so scary.."
Boy: "Then say that you love me.."
Girl: "Fine..I love you..can you slow down now?"
Boy: "Give me a big hug.."

The girl gave him a big hug.

Girl: "Now can you slow down?"
Boy: "Can you take off my helmet and put it on? It's uncomfortable and it's bothering me while i ride."

The next day, there was a story in the newspaper. A motorcycle had crashed into a building because its brakes were broken.
There were two people on the motorcycle, of which one died, and the other had survived...The guy knew that the brakes were broken. He didn't want to let the girl know, because he knew that the girl would have gotten scared.
Instead, he was told the last time that she loved him,got a hug from her,put his helmet on her so that she can live, and die himself...

Once in a while, Right in the middle of an ordinary life, Love gives us a fairy tale...

"Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you hold well"


*************************** Story 2 ***************************

Nurse: "It was a busy morning, approximately 8:30 am, when an elderly gentleman, in his 80's, presented to have sutures (stitches) removed from his thumb.

He stated that he was in a hurry as he had an appointment at 9:00 am. I (nurse) took his vital signs and had him take a seat, knowing it would be over an hour befor e someone would to able to see him.

I saw him looking at his watch and decided, since I was not busy with another patient, I would evaluate his wound. On exam it was well healed,so I talked to one of the doctors, got the needed supplies to remove his sutures and redress his wound.

While taking care of his wound, we began to engage in conversation. Asked him if he had a doctor's appointment this morning somewhere else,as he was in such a hurry. The gentleman told me no, that he needed to go to the nursing home to eat breakfast with his wife.

I then inquired as to her health. He told me that she had been there for a while and that she was a victim of Alzheimer Disease.

As we talked, and I finished dressing his wound, I asked if she would be worried if he was a bit late. He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that she had not recognized him in five years now.

I was surprised, and asked him. "And you are still going every morning,even though she doesn't know who you are?" He smiled as he patted my hand and said. "She doesn't know me, but I still know who she is."

I had to hold back tears as he left, I had goose bumps on my arm, and thought, "That is the kind of love I want in my life."

True love is neither physical, nor romantic. True love is an acceptance of all that is, has been, will be, and will not be.

Good friends are like stars...You don't always see them, but you always know they're there


*************************** STORY 3 ***************************

The passengers on the bus watched sympathetically as the attractive young woman with the white cane made her way carefully up the steps. She paid the driver and, using her hands to feel the location of the seats, walked down the aisle and found the seat he'd told her was empty. Then she's settled in, placed her briefcase on her lap and rested her cane against her leg.

It had been a year since Susan became blind. Due to a medical misdiagnosis she had been rendered sightless, and she was suddenly thrown into a world of darkness, anger, frustration and self-pity. 'How could this have happened to me?' she would plead, her heart knotted with anger.
But no matter how much she cried or ranted or prayed, she knew the painful truth, her sight was never going to return.
A cloud of depression hung over Susan's once optimistic spirit. All she had to cling to was her husband Mark.

Mark was an Air Force officer and he loved Susan with all his heart. When she first lost her sight, he watched her sink into despair and was determined to help his wife gain the strength she needed to become independent again.

Finally, Susan felt ready to return to her job, but how would she get there? She used to take the bus, but was now too frightened to get around the city by herself. Mark volunteered to drive her to work each day, even though they worked at opposite ends of the city. At first, this comforted Susan and fulfilled Mark's need to protect his sightless wife who was so insecure about performing the slightest task. Soon, however Mark realized that this arrangement wasn't working - it was hectic, and costly.

Susan is going to have to start taking the bus again, he admitted to himself. But just the thought of mentioning it to her made him cringe.
She was still so fragile, so angry. How would she react?

Just as Mark predicted, Susan was horrified at the idea of taking the bus again. "I'm blind!" she responded bitterly. "How am I supposed to know where I'm going? I feel like you're abandoning me."

Mark's heart broke but he knew what had to be done. He promised Susan that each day he would ride the bus with her until she got the hang of it.

And that is exactly what happened. For two solid weeks, Mark, military uniform and all, accompanied Susan to and from work each day. He taught her how to rely on her other senses to determine where she was and how to adapt to her new environment. He helped her befriend the bus drivers who could watch out for her, and save her a seat. Each morning they made the journey together, and Mark would take a cab back to his office.

Although this routine was even more costly and exhausting than the previous one, Mark knew it was only a matter of time before Susan would be able to ride the bus on her own. Finally, Susan decided that she was ready to try the trip on her own. Monday morning arrived, and before she left, she threw her arms around Mark, her temporary bus riding companion, her
husband, and her best friend. Her eyes filled with tears of gratitude for his loyalty, his patience, his love.

She said good-bye, and for the first time, they went their separate ways.

Monday, Tuesday,

Wednesday, Thursday.... Each day on her own went perfectly, and Susan had never felt better.

On Friday mor ning, Susan took the bus to work as usual. As she was paying for her fare to exit the bus, the driver said, "Boy, I sure envy you."

Susan wasn't sure if the driver was speaking to her or not. After all, who on earth would ever envy a blind woman who had struggled just to find the courage to live for the past year? "Why do you envy me?"

The driver responded, "It must feel so good to be taken care of and protected like you are." Susan had no idea what the driver was talking about, "What do you mean?" The driver said, "You know, every morning for the past week, a fine looking gentleman in a military uniform has been standing across the corner watching you when you get off the bus. He makes sure you cross the street safely and he watches you until you enter your office building. Then he blows you a kiss, gives you a little salute and walks away. You are one lucky lady."

Tears of happiness poured down Susan's cheeks. For although she couldn't see him, she had always felt Mark's presence. She was blessed, so blessed, for he had given her a gift more powerful than sight, a gift she didn't need to see to believe - the gift of love that can bring light where there had been darkness.

"You don't love a woman because she is beautiful, but she is beautiful because you love her..."

So if you love someone be faithful to that person.


*************************** STORY 4 ***************************

From the very beginning, girl's family objected strongly on her dating this guy, saying that it has got to do with family background, & that the girl will have to suffer for the rest of her life if she were to be with him.

Due to family's pressure, the couple quarrelled very often. Though the girl loved the guy deeply, she always asked him: "How deep is your love for me?"

As the guy is not good with his words, this often caused the girl to be very upset. With that & the family's pressure, the girl often vents her anger on him. As for him, he only endured it in silence.

After a couple of years, the guy finally graduated & decided to further his studies overseas. Before leaving, he proposed to the girl:

"I'm not very good with words. But all I know is that I love you. If you allow me, I will take care of you for the rest of my life. As for your family, I'll try my best to talk them round. Will you marry me?" The girl agreed, & with the guy's determination, the family finally gave in &
agreed to let them get married. So before he left, they got engaged.

The girl went out to the working society, whereas the guy was overseas,continuing his studies. They sent their love through emails & phone calls.
Though it was hard, but both never thought of giving up.

One day, while the girl was on her way to work, she was knocked down by a car that lost control. when she woke up, she saw her parents beside her bed.. She realized that she was badly injured.

Seeing her mum crying, she wanted to comfort her. But she realized that all that could
come out of her mouth was just a sigh. she had lost her voice....

The doctor says that the impact on her brain has caused her to lose her voice. Listening to her parents' comfort, but with nothing coming out fromher, she broke down. During the stay in hospital, besides silence cry,..it's still just silence cry that accompanied her.

Upon reaching home, everything seems to be the same. Except for the ringing tone of the
phone. Which pierced into her heart everytime it rang. She does not wish to let the guy know & not wanting to be a burden to him, she wrote a letter to him saying that she does not wish to wait any longer.

With that, she sent the ring back to him. In return, the guy sent millions & millions of reply, countless of phonecalls,.. all the girl could do, besides crying, is still crying.... The parents decided to move away, hoping that she could eventually forget everything & be happy.

With a new environment, the girl learns sign language & started a new life. Te lling herself everyday that she must forget the guy.
One day, her friend came & told her that he's back. She asked her friend not to let
him know what happened to her. Since then, there wasn't anymore news of him.
A year has passed & her friend came with an envelope, containing ainvitation card for the guy's wedding. The girl was shattered. When she open the letter, she saw her name in it instead. When she was about to ask her friend what's going on, she saw the guy standing in front of her.

He used sign language to tell her "I've spent a year to learn sign language. Just to let you know that I've not forgotten our promise. Let me have the chance to be your voice. I Love You." With that, he slipped the ring back into her finger. The girl finally smiled.

Treat every relationship as if it's the last one, then you'll know how to Give. Treat every moment as is it's the last day, then you'll know how to treasure.

Treasure what you have right now, or else you will regret one day...
-----from : Ontanggabe Parulian --thanks buddy

Your Love Personality

It is an obvious fact that we can learn and know what true love is. What we are often not aware of though, is that there are different love trends. Does it even matter if we understand love trends? If we are in a happy relationship, then that means it is all fine, right? Yes and No. Although, your love with your partner might run smoothly for a while, it can take a turn we often never expect. This is why knowing about love trends is helpful.

What may have turned you or your partner on at first, might not be a turn on later. How is this possible if they seemed so crazy over certain things before? The reason is quite simple and reasonable. When we first get involved with people, the attraction and lust is so strong (not that it would not be later), that the way one seduces the other is not truly focused on, but simply instantly appreciated, since they are so drawn to one another.

As the relationship proceeds and the bond builds, you will start getting in touch with your own style of loving and expecting your partner to match up to it. At times, this will be just the case. Couples can share the same love trend, but at other times, they can differ. If your trends do differ, do not look at it as negative, but as a way to combine them and form a creative love trend together. It should not be one way or the other. There is no such thing as the wrong way to love, except for obsession, controlling and abuse, of course-which is not love anyway, although some feel it is.

How do you even come about recognizing the love personality of yours or your partners? It is not difficult, but does require quite a bit amount of observation. Start by making notes of your romantic qualities and ideas of what great romance, sex and seduction is to you. Do you like walks on the beach and dining at cozy, romantic restaurants? Or do you like setting up your sexual activities by setting up a scene and playing along with it, or just going with the flow? By knowing what trend you follow, you will then be introduced to your romantic identity and know what you need from your partner.

There are several types of love trends that you should know about. It will help you come to a deeper understanding of what type of lover you are and your partner as well. People, whose personalities follow the emotional trend, are lovers who pay attention more to the meaning behind things, instead of the thing itself. A man who does not really care for picnics on the beach may still love the event due to the intention behind it. He sees the effort his mate put into it and sees the love and caring meaning that his mate had when the idea was thought of and planned. Emotional lovers are sensitive and love sharing with their partners and are also very spiritual. They do not hold back from expressing their true feelings.

A Creative trend follower on the other hand, may have some of the same traits as an emotional lover, but focuses more on discovering new things and trying them out, taking risks for a bigger thrill. They love to plan and be a part of interesting activities with their lovers because they like going through adventures and new territories together. These types of lovers are found to be quite exciting because they seem to be more mysterious and full of surprises and imagination.

Then you have the traditional trend follower, who likes to follow the rules of what society considers the right way to handle a relationship. They believe in having one partner, following the dating and romance guides to the point (bringing a girl some flowers when picking her up at the door for a date, just to mention one). They also believe in being organized, being financially responsible and planning the events that will take place in their lives with their partners.

Those are the main trends that most people fall into following. This does not mean that a person who has a certain love trend cannot carry qualities from other trends, however. It just means they in general carry that love personality. There is no trend better than the other either. Each trend is unique and interesting in it�s own way. When two people follow the same trend, it is fabulous because they both know exactly what the other is fond of and what to expect as well. There are hardly mixed signals. Having different trends is also a wonderful thing. When a couple has their individual love personality, it opens the door for each one to learn new ways to love expressions and can create a great trend combination!

Considering and accepting our partner�s different trend of love is extremely important to do. If you do not, it will seems like you are just determined to have the romance in your relationship to go your way, by your trend. This will definitely cause unhappiness and have a very high possibility for your mate to back away from romance with you, because he or she will feel that there is lack of attention towards their needs and trends concerning romancing. So remember to be considerate and learn to adapt to their ways too.

It feels fabulous when our lover is being considerate of our trend, respecting it, following it with us often. You cannot be the one always being considered however. You will then become what is called a Constant Receiver. Constant Receivers are always on the look out for themselves. They never look beyond their trend and the needs that are involved with it. They always observe whether or not they are getting what they need and want from their lovers, and if they feel they could be getting more, they grab more. What about your partner? What are his or her needs? Have you even considered what their trend is about and how you can compromise and follow theirs sometimes? Never let these questions go unnoticed. If you find yourself being a constant receiver, it does not mean you are a bad person, but that you have been a little careless. When you realize this, stop yourself and look deep down. You will probably realize that you are aware of your over receiving, and have been so flattered by it that you got carried away. Once you have sorted this out, you can start returning the favor back to your partner.

Being a Constant Giver also has its down side. Yes, you would be always pleasing your partner, but what about you? Is having your trend considered not important? Of course it is! Do not be too furious with your mate if this happens. Just remember what you just learned about Constant Receivers. Your mate most likely did not ignore your trend needs on purpose, but just got carried away with being pampered. After all, you did you create this situation when you were over giving! So many people fall under this category of giving too much. This is because most people believe it is more important to please their lovers than having their own needs and wants fulfilled. Caring about pleasing your partner is good, but disowning your own romantic identity and needs, is not. Get back on track by getting your guilt in order first. Know that you should not feel guilty for wanting or needing something from your partner. You are entitled to having those needs fulfilled. You also should not look at giving as the good thing, while receiving is the bad thing. They are both good when equally exchanged. Start bringing your romantic trend and needs to your mate�s attention. You can do this by bringing up a good movie that is coming out and letting them know that you really want to see it. Re-teach them that they should give too, instead of always receiving from you.

Just highlight the fact that there are different love trends and that they are all unique and deserve to be followed and participated in. As a couple, you will not only please each other, but learn more about the other as well! As long as you do not forget this and understand the importance of an equal share between giving and receiving, your combination of love personalities will live in a content environment.- Love sessions