How to Love Love is a strange thing. It can be the most amazing feeling in the world, or it can really hurt, but in the end love is something most, if not all of us, will face. While there are many different ways to define love and there are many different ways to love someone (even yourself), here is a general guide to loving.
1. Say it. When you say the words "I Love You," do they carry it with them the desire to show someone you love them or do they carry it with them is it what you want to feel? And when you say it make sure you really mean it and are willing to do anything for that special person.
2. Empathize. Put yourself in someone else's shoes. Rather than impose your own expectations or attempt to control them, try to understand how they feel, where they come from, and who they are; and realize how they could also love you back just as well.
3. Love unconditionally.
If you cannot love another person without attaching stipulations, then it is not love at all, but deep-seated opportunism (one who makes the most of an advantage, often unmindful of others). If your interest is not in the other person as such, but rather in how that person can enhance your experience of life, then it is not unconditional. If you have no intention of improving that person’s life, or allowing that person to be themselves and accepting them as they are, and not who you want them to be, then you are not striving to love them unconditionally.
4. Expect nothing in return.
That doesn't mean you should allow someone to mistreat or undervalue you. It means that giving love does not guarantee receiving love. Try loving just for loving's sake. Realize that someone may have a different way of showing his or her love for you; do not expect to be loved back in exactly the same way.
5. Realize it can be lost.
If you realize that you can lose the one you love, then you have a greater appreciation of what you have. Think how lucky you are to have someone to love. * It does not make you a bad person to desire someone else's love, even if they do not love you. However, to truly love someone, you must let them be free. It is selfish to blame them for your feelings. * There are many types of love, for example: a mother-son love is different from a best friend's love, which is different from a romantic love. Don't be ashamed to tell anyone that you love your friends as much as you love anyone else in your life. * You have to find someone that will suit you, someone you feel comfortable with - not just someone to make love to. * As a word, love can be found worldwide and is often used to describe compassion and/or emotional attachment. Accepting those you love for who they are is part of love. You also need to learn to accept yourself before you can accept another. If you cannot love your self, how are you to love another? * Love genuinely. Do not compare your feelings now to what your feelings were when you were with another mate. At times, we can experience rejection. * Realize that love is a feeling and attempt to assist, but ultimately, you are the one who must take action in order to discover love. * Do things that make the other person feel good, but do not smoother them with gifts and attention. * Consider some tips about what people in love do. o People in love are sensitive to each other's needs, and endeavor to meet them even when they do not feel like doing it. o Men and women may be equal in value but different by nature. People who truly are in love give their mates "space" to develop their potential and find their fulfillment in life.
Sometimes love is all we need o Love does not brag. People who are truly in love refrain from rehearsing their good traits just to show off. Bragging in a relationship often is really defensiveness. o People who are truly in love do not insist that their way is best and demand that their mates give in to them. o People who are truly in love are considerate of each others feelings and courteous in their actions toward one another. Sadly sarcasm is a way of life for some couples. They ridicule each other, belittle each other and trade jibes with a fury. They may say it is all in fun, but it leaves wounds that will someday become festering sores. o People who are truly in love look out for their mates' best interests as much as their own. Those in love should be concerned not only about their own individual interests, but about the interests of the other as well. o People who truly love control their anger when the other displeases them. We are all human, and all humans feel anger periodically, but we only express our anger in destructive ways when we counting on someone else to meet our needs. o People who truly love each other do not take pleasure in their mates' disappointments or failures. o People who truly love each other treat their mates with absolute trust. Some husbands and wives torment themselves with groundless suspicions. If you look for trouble you will find it every time. o People who truly love look forward to their relationship growing more meaningful and precious. They have hope. Which is an attitude that happily anticipates the good. It isn't being blind and denies there are problems, but it does look beyond the problems. People who truly love each other do not allow their problems to rob them of their happiness. * Remember there is no failure in love, because once you tell somebody who you love, that you love him/her, then you have already succeeded in love. * You must love yourself before you can love another. * There is always the risk of getting hurt, but that's part of letting yourself fully love and trust some one. Being hurt could be long-lasting and could hurt more than anything in the world. * Realize what you have while you have it, and care for the person you trust. * If something comes to an end, try to let go rather than holding on; it's for the best. * The idea of love is fueled by childhood fantasies. The love shown in movies, as obtainable as it may be, is rare to say the least. * You just may find your soul-mate sooner than you want to. * If you feel any doubt of love your partner has for you, it is probably true. when you give and receive love 100%, you will have no doubt in your heart. * Don't ask for love - you should receive love because your partner wants to give you love - not because you want it from your partner. * Do not force love - it will come in good time, it will come.
Believe. God will give you in best time. Learn to love your self and learn to love other in right way. Soon, you'll find your soulmate.
How to Date on a Budget
Once upon a time a cheap date used to be a movie and a bite afterwards. Not so anymore! That might sound like a fairy tale, but it is the truth.
A movie and popcorn is one of the most expensive dates there is today, unless you figure a burger and coke! Sure, thats cheap, but what do you do before or after?
A little thought on your part, and the right partner, can make a great date, and still leave some change in your pocket.
1. The first date should be a meeting to see if you both enjoy the same things and how well you relate to each other.
Ask them out for a cup of coffee or ice cream. Take a walk. Talk on the telephone, or email. Learn what means a lot to them, and the things that they enjoy doing. This information will enable you to prepare for the first actual date. You cannot plan, for instance, a picnic in the park, if the date is used to eating at the Ritz.
2. Have coffee in a large bookstore cafe, and look through the books, or music to get an idea of what your partner enjoys. If your partner looks interested in any particular items that they sell, or the candy on display, mark it down to memory. These things are useful when holidays or special moments come around, or when you want to just give them a gift to please them.
3. Scan the newspapers for interesting places to visit. There usually is a concert in the park, or perhaps in the Mall. This can be great fun and is an inexpensive 'date'. This also could be quite romantic, if you hold hands while walking to find a seat, or just walking the Mall. Just remember to bring her a small gift when you picked them up.
Did you remember what they were looking at when you met at the bookstore? Your date will be surprised and pleased that you noticed and remembered!
4. For women or guys who like the outdoors, spend the day on a nature trail, in the park, or on the beach and pack a picnic lunch with their favorite foods to make it extra special. End the day, by having a movie night for two, with candy and home-popped popcorn. Go together, and pick out a movie that you both would enjoy.
5. Show your partner affection and let them know you love having them close. Lunch at a fast food place will seem like a great place to eat, because you are enjoying just being together. Meet with friends later, for coffee and dessert.
When the relationship is a good one, you do not have to spend a lot of money because your date will be happy just to be with you, even if you only spend the day walking in the park. While walking you get to know each other better, and will have things to talk about when you date again.
* Hunt for gift items, at discount stores. Buy greeting cards, for all occasions, and the Dollar Card Stores. It is not the price that counts, it is the thought. Make a card yourself, and add your own words and thoughts.
* If you like to cook, pasta dinner, with salad and inexpensive wine, makes for a great budget dinner. Do not forget to have candles on the table, for that romantic touch.
* If you are really on a budget, you can borrow movies from the library (some libraries might charge you, others might not, so check first). *
Check out your local zoo or museum, usually these are inexpensive places to go on a date and explore a little. Occasionally, these places will also have Free days. Also look to see if a carnival is in town too.
* Plan a road trip to a fun place or accompany her on an errand such as grocery shopping. (This works well if you've been friends for awhile)
* Go Dutch (Sometimes women do not like having the guy pay for everything. Paying separately or have alternate between who pays can add variety)
* Remember that if you are planning on a long term relation, each partner should enjoy the other's company, not the lifestyle this person can provide. If you are supposed to pay all the time, just for the honor of having the other persons company, that relation is worthless and dangerous.
* Because of rising gas prices, a walk in town or a walk through a mall could be better ideas for those on strict budgets, this also allows you to get to know them better by seeing which stores they are attracted to.
* If there is a minor league sports team nearby, consider going to a game. Tickets to these events are often only a couple of dollars, and are a great way to spend the afternoon or evening.
* Check around your community for independently-owned or discount movie theatres. Tickets will cost less (often only two or three dollars), as will concessions. In addition, these theatres will be less crowded, so you're less likely to get stuck behind someone tall or in front of someone loud.
* Be wary of partners who window shop with you, and only show you the most expensive items. Watch to see if your "partner" orders the most expensive meal on the menu, or discusses expensive ways to spend the day. All they want is someone to pay their way, and are probably not there for a long term relationship. Make sure that when you first meet, they do not know you have a lot of money so that their choice on whether to date you or not is not based on money at all. When the money goes, so will they!
How to Respond When Asked on a Date Not sure how to answer a guy who has asked you out?
1. If you want to go out with him, then just say yes. If you really like him, then go for it. Even if you get embarrassed easily, it's just one word.2. If you don't want to go out with him, don't say yes! This could just end up hurting him more - no one wants to go out with someone who doesn't like them.3. Try to say either yes or no. Even if you're shocked, do not say maybe.
4. If you don't like the guy that way, then say no in a nice way. Don't be harsh in your letdown; it probably took him weeks to get the courage to confront you.
5. Never say yes if you don't want to be his girlfriend. It's better to get rejected than to think you have a chance with someone when you don't.
6. If you do say no try to put him down gently, but don't go on and on. It will just get boring and uncomfortable, and you giving him all the reasons why you don't want to go out with him wont help him.
7. If you want a date with him but you think the time is not suitable, just propose another time so that he doesn't take it as a rejection. * Don't act desperate when you say yes, you'll only embarrass yourself. * Say, "Yeah, sounds like fun!" or, "Yes, I'd love to."
* A cute, flirtatious, 'sure!' would also win the day. * If you say no, don't carry on having stabs at him and his confidence.
* How do you know that you won't like this guy? I've had experiences where I will say, "Yes," anyways and end up having a great time! Give the guy a chance! After all, he was brave enough to ask. * NEVER spread gossips on someone to whom you've said no. Once you've done so your point is made and there's little point giving him a hard time.
